If you are the mother of little girls and boys like I am instead of teenagers, you may be wondering how manners should come into play in your home.  Well, my theory is teach them when they are young and they will remember it when they are old.  Manners are just like anything else in our lives they take practice to truly make a routine and daily part of your child’s life.

Some of the things that I personally start young with my children are manners such as “yes ma’am and no ma’am” or “yes sir and no sir”.  I also encourage them to say “please” and “thank you” even if it is just to each other, but especially to adults.  I also encourage them to hold doors open for other people and not push or rush in line.

Other things I believe are important are saying the blessing at meal times and making prayers a part of our daily routine, this may not seem like it relates to manners, but it is something we do as a “Christian” family.

Finally, I encourage my children to keep private matters private and not talk loudly or speak when adults are talking.  These are just a few of the things I believe we can do to “begin” our children with manners even when they are young.

Photo Credit: AD-Passion

Likely, if you have a teenage daughter, then you’ve experienced talking with them about “love”.

Are they in “love”?

Do they want to fall in love?

Are they experiencing what some of us might call “puppy love”?

One or all of these things “might” be the case, but none the less it is an important time for them and as moms we must be prepared to deal with and talk about the subject that we know is more than fuzzy feelings and butterflies in the stomach – L-O-V-E.

Love for us as humans is difficult to define.  We know that God is love and that his gift of his only Son Jesus on the cross was the greatest sacrifice of love we will ever know, but we may often wonder, how we can understand this on a human level and how it relates to what we know and feel as “romantic” love or even “friendship” love.  The truth is there are many different kinds of and levels of love, all of which we must learn to feel and understand as we grow older.  And to be honest, the older you get the more you understand it,  wouldn’t you agree?

So, how do you help your daughter to differentiate between what they know and understand as the love you have for them, or the love God has for them and the love they have for their friends or that they “think” they have for a member of the opposite sex?

As we celebrate Valentine’s this weekend, and this month is all about “love”, it is important to remember that when we talk to our daughters about love and what “true” love is, that we point out, if she is of the appropriate age that love does NOT equal sex.

In our society unfortunately teens are being led to believe more and more each day that if someone loves you, you have sex with them.  This is leading to not only broken hearts, but broken futures.  We must educate our daughters about the true meaning of love and instill confidence in them that will help them to stand for their own convictions about the Biblical meaning of love and what it can mean in their lives.

Check out our Mom-Daughter True Love Waits Guide to start the conversation on this important topic with your daughter today.

This weekend I spoke to a group of 1st – 6th grade girls.  The topic was what they can learn from Queen Esther.  Queen Esther was a very brave young woman.  One of the girls there was to me, very brave.  She asked me question after question about the story, about myself, about whatever came to her mind I assume.

The good thing to me about her asking questions was that it showed me that she was listening.  She was taking in what I was saying and she was processing it.  I believe that asking questions is a good thing.  This brought me to think about, “Do you allow your daughter to ask questions?”  We as parents want our children to come to us with problems, with issues, with fears, but are we open and willing for them to ask questions.

Honestly, this speaks to me, because my oldest, a boy, is a question asker.  I kept thinking that it was his age, he’s six, but I shouldn’t want it to stop there.  I should want him to ask questions as he gets older, because I want to know he’s listening, I want to know he is thinking things through, I want to know that he values what I have to say.

Think about this. . . what do you want your daughter to ask you questions about.  Feel free to share in the comments below:

photo credit: adamci

Over the next few weeks I’m going to be sharing some ideas for “conversations” to have with your tween or teen girl.  Hear what I have to say about talking about expectations with your daughter here:

It’s a new year and for many of us that means that we have set goals or resolutions, which may include either getting rid of some old habits or creating some new habits. Did you know it takes 21 days to make something a habit?

I hope to develop the new habit of exercising in this New year. Not necessarily to lose weight, but to stay fit and healthy and to have more energy. Many ladies I know are wanting to develop the habit of spending time in God’s word. That had been one of my goals for several previous years and luckily for me it has become a habit and is now just a natural part of my routine.

Whether you are a mom or a tween or teen girl, you likely have some old habits you want to get rid of and some new habits you want to embrace. Remember as God Word says, “we can do all things through Christ who gives us strength”. Philippians 4:13 {paraphrased}

I’m wondering, what are some of the habits you hope to dump, what are some of the habits you hope to create?

Have you ever thought about it, have you ever done it, have you ever witnessed it, what you are wondering?  A blessing!  I’m sure you have lived long enough to be blessed.  Blessed by God, blessed by others, you have undoubtedly received a blessing since you have been on earth. 

Last night I witnessed and received a blessing.  My pastor involved the children in the sermon at church in the evening service, but not only that, he gave them a blessing.  He had the adults of the church who would to come and lay hands on my child and bless him  (only my oldest was in the service).  I know without a shadow of a doubt that the people who prayed over him blessed him,  I know without a shadow of a doubt that God blessed Him through them, and I know without a shadow of a doubt that the sheer witnessing of this event was a blessing to me.  It was powerful, it gave me chills, it filled me with hope.

Have you blessed your children lately?  They are a blessing from our Heavenly Father and we should feel blessed to be their parents, but not only that we should impart upon them blessings.  Pray for them, give them praise for their good deeds, love them unconditionally, be a blessing!

The picture is of my “boys”.  What a blessing!

Today, I had a very common experience that made me realize God’s presence even in the little things. This may sound trite, but please bear with me.  I just recently purchased with my birthday money a headset for my Blackberry cell phone.  I purchased this to use when driving to keep myself and my little ones safe.  I have not owned this item for even a week and today I lost it.

You see, I was running errands in town, picking up somethings and then grabbing some chicken at lunch at a local gas station.  This is when I “misplaced” this new tiny toy.  I had already made it back to my mother in law’s 4 miles away before I realized it.  Therefore, I had to go all the way back to town to find the headset.  Tiny, small enough to place on your ear I was sure I’d never find it and if I did that it’d be crushed by either someone stepping on it or worse a car running over it.

A Similar Headset to Mine

However, on the way back to town I prayed, Lord help me find this headset I spent good money on it and I hate to have lost it so soon.  Making it to the gas station I pulled up and tried to park a ways from the exact place I had before so that I wouldn’t chance running over it myself.  I jumped out of my van, looked around and in less than 10 seconds spotted the headset.  I think I might have shouted.  I definitely praised God all the way back home.  Ladies, he’s with us even in the little things.

I have not always been the type of person to put others first.  I’ll admit that many times in life I have been extremely selfish.  That was before I understood the definition of joy.  Joy, is something I want in life, and before you start thinking joy is the same as happiness think again.  Joy comes from our Heavenly Father, but it comes when we operate in the mindset of J-O-Y, Jesus, Others, Yourself.  Putting things in that perspective and order in life will truly bring you “joy”.

Biblical tools.org explains joy this way,

“Biblical joy is a fruit, a byproduct, an additional blessing, not the end in itself. It flows into and grows within the person whose life and energies are not focused merely on being “joyful.” The lives of those in this world who are so zealously chasing after it prove this point. If they are still chasing it, they must not yet have it. God’s Word also substantiates this.”

I don’t know about you, but I am willing to do what it takes to be joyful. I want to sing to the top of my lungs the song from my childhood, “I’ve got the joy, joy, joy, joy down in my heart, where, down in my heart, where, down in my heart, I’ve got the joy, joy, joy, joy down in my heart, where, down in my heart to stay” and mean it with my whole heart. What about you?

For a long time I have said that the mission of Beauty by Design Ministries has been “turning the hearts of girls towards God”, while this is still true, I mostly do this through my offline live events, when I do interactive girls or mother daughter events and my keynote speaking.  However, I do much more online, and my mission online is a bit different.  I wanted to make my mission clear.  I’m not “changing” it but I am embracing a new mission for my online community here at Beauty by Design.  That mission is:

“Helping moms to connect and communicate with their teen and tween girls.”

This will continue to be done in a variety of ways:

• This blog.
• The Mom-Daughter Connection Radio Show & Podcast. A new podcast is available now here on accountability.
• Our Ezine.
• Our Information Products.
• Our Seminar Series.

I am excited about this and hope that you will gain some valuable information to help you in your relationship with your daughter.  This mission comes from my heart.  I believe it is because I had and still have a strong relationship with my mom that my relationship with Christ is where it is today, and that my life is where it is today.  I want the same for my relationship with my own daughter and I want the same for all of you!

This weekend I took some BIG steps of faith, overcame some of my own fears and obstacles and i am ready for what God has around the next corner.  I hope this video will provide some encouragement to you on overcome your own fears and obstacles and to take some steps of faith.

Sometimes we need to remember who it is all about…..not us! That’s for sure!

If you can ignore the old school hairstyles and wardrobe and just listen to the words this is a great song.  It is from my junior high days if I’m not mistaken.  Anyway, I love the song and it has been some “inspiration” for a new project of mine.

This song, explains the way I feel about worship right now:

This weekend was “Labor Day” Weekend and while many across the blogosphere gave you their “labor” stories of birthing their babies, I am going to give you a different kind of labor story.  I spent my labor day weekend putting the final touches on and laboring over a project that has been one of the longest “labor” experiences I have ever had.

The idea of creating charm school materials that encompassed the many things that I learned in modeling school as a teenager, combined with Biblical concepts has been a dream of mine since I was a teenager.  I attended modeling school at age 15, worked as a modeling instructor at age 17, and directed a satellite location of a modeling school for several years in my early 20s.

The concepts that I learned in modeling school gave me confidence, helped me to “come out of my shell” and shaped my shy personality into a more confident demeanor.  I am convinced that God put the opportunity in my path as a stepping stone to his future plans for my life.

The missing piece in modeling school was the “Biblical” influence and the knowledge that God created each of us unique and that he has a plan for our lives.  This is what so many of the girls I attended modeling school with,  taught in modeling school and modeled along side for years were missing.  They had a hole in their lives they were needing to fill but the things that were offered in the modeling world would never truly fill that void.

I knew this as a Christian and though I shared with many girls my faith, I wanted to do more.  This is why creating workshops that taught the same principles I learned in modeling school, of “speaking up with confidence”, of “having good posture” and many more paired with God’s Word became a dream of mine.

I have labored over these materials for years, literally, coming back to the idea from time to time, creating a keynote speech or two which I gave at churches, retreats and events over the past 3-4 years.  Then, I began getting contacted about whether or not I had these materials in print for others to use in their own churches.  The truth was I did not, but I wanted to.  This spurred me on to creating the workbook, so between having 2 babies in two years, I wrote the workbook.  I launched it on my website last September and have sold numerous ebook (digital) copies.  Then I began receiving emails about a “leader guide” to accompany the workbook.  This took some time to create and I completed it this July.

Yesterday, the dream of seeing these materials in actual print rather than ebook form became a reality.  I took them to a local printer and had them printed.  Copies are now available on my website, Christian Charm School.com.  I am also talking with a publisher about getting them published and in bookstores.  This is an exciting time and the labor of my newest baby is coming to an end.

We must prepare ourselves to live for God no matter what life brings us. This is something that we should learn to do from a young age. Because, the fact is no matter how young you are, or no matter how old you are, life is not “a bed of roses”. Life will slam you with many things.

You must be firmly planted. In order to face life’s challenges, in order to stay strong come what may you must have faith. Faith, as Scripture says, “Comes by hearing and hearing by the word of God.” (Romans 10:17) After we have accepted through faith, Jesus Christ into our lives we must then begin the process of “growing” in our faith. This is what will allow us to be “firmly planted” come what may.

As Ephesians 4 states,

“But to each one of us grace has been given as Christ apportioned it. 8This is why it[a] says:
“When he ascended on high,
he led captives in his train
and gave gifts to men.”

It was he who gave some to be apostles, some to be prophets, some to be evangelists, and some to be pastors and teachers, to prepare God’s people for works of service, so that the body of Christ may be built up until we all reach unity in the faith and in the knowledge of the Son of God and become mature, attaining to the whole measure of the fullness of Christ.

Then we will no longer be infants, tossed back and forth by the waves, and blown here and there by every wind of teaching and by the cunning and craftiness of men in their deceitful scheming. Instead, speaking the truth in love, we will in all things grow up into him who is the Head, that is, Christ. From him the whole body, joined and held together by every supporting ligament, grows and builds itself up in love, as each part does its work.” Ephesians 4: 7-16

Therefore, this growth is important it is what prepares us to be able to stand firm, “come what may”. So, begin now no matter what your age to grow in your faith. If you are not already doing so begin a daily quiet time with God, spending time in prayer and in Bible study. Seek out a mentor and spend time with them, someone who is Godly and more mature spiritually than yourself. Regularly attend worship services, becoming actively involved in the church through service. These are all things that will help you to grow in your faith and as a result not be shifted like sand when life’s challenges come about you can stand firm, “come what may”.

Photo Credit: Martin LaBar

Sometimes as moms, we get the crazy idea that because we have become responsible for the lives of precious little children, that we should focus solely on them and leave our own thoughts and ideas for ourselves behind.  This should not be the case.  We as moms should be true to ourselves, use the passions and gifts that God has given us and set some goals for ourselves.

These goals will not only benefit us, as people, but also our families as well.  Its kind of like the old saying, “If momma ain’t happy, ain’t nobody happy.” Naturally, our children, husbands, families and others around us will benefit from us taking care of ourselves and doing things that will help us to feel more productive and successful.

The Lord also expects us to use the gifts that he has given us.  He tells us in Scripture that without every part of the body of Christ functioning at its best it will not work.

“ If they were all one part, where would the body be? As it is, there are many parts, but one body. The eye cannot say to the hand, “I don’t need you!” And the head cannot say to the feet, “I don’t need you!” On the contrary, those parts of the body that seem to be weaker are indispensable, and the parts that we think are less honorable we treat with special honor. And the parts that are unpresentable are treated with special modesty, while our presentable parts need no special treatment. But God has combined the members of the body and has given greater honor to the parts that lacked it, so that there should be no division in the body, but that its parts should have equal concern for each other. If one part suffers, every part suffers with it; if one part is honored, every part rejoices with it. Now you are the body of Christ, and each one of you is a part of it.”
1 Corinthians 12:19-27

This scripture passage makes it clear why it is so important for us to use what God has given us. He gave us those gifts and abilities so we can function as a part of the body of Christ, and that includes our families.  We have a responsibility to our families to do our part.  Part of that is setting goals for not only us but for our families as well.

So, mom, how about you setting some goals?  Here are a few tips to get you started:

Family goals can include your marriage, your children, or the whole family.  They can be fun or serious.  Fun goals might be to save money for a vacation, or to have family night every Saturday night, while goals that are more serious might include paying off debt or seeking to improve your marriage.

Then you will also want to set some individual goals just for you.  There are probably things you have put on the backburner or put off doing altogether because you have become a mom, why not take one of those things to focus on a year and make it happen.

Whether the goals are for your family or for you, it will be so fulfilling to make them a reality.  Of course, once one goal is accomplished it is time to set a new one and begin working to achieve it.  It is a never-ending process that you and your family can always benefit from, so keep it up.

“Faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we cannot see.” Hebrews 11:1 (NIV)

“Without faith it is impossible to please God.” Hebrews 11:6 (NIV)

If you have ever struggled through any situation in life, and you’re a Christian, then you probably understand the process of faith. It is by faith that we come to know and believe in Christ. It is by faith that we walk, not by sight. Does anyone besides me find this a difficult thing to do sometimes? I think that we all struggle. Without struggles, valley experiences in our life, we would never be able to soar above the mountaintops. Don’t you agree?

My faith has gotten me through many things in life, financial difficulties, and family illnesses. My first experiences with it that I remember I was around 13 or 14 years old and dealing with the severe illness of my grandfather, who we lost to cancer, at the age of 56. I then experienced it more and more throughout my teen years, dealing with friends, parents, making decisions about my future. God always seemed to make me wait on that next step. I always wanted the big picture, a road map, a completed puzzle, not just one piece, but he was faithful to reveal his plans to me piece by piece. He is still doing that today.

Since marrying, I have been through many difficult times financially, not certain where the next dollar would come from, but it always came sometimes 10 or 100 fold. Yes, I have actually had someone hand me a $1000 for nothing, a blessing yes, a miracle, no, just God’s work! I like to call it God’s miracle math. His math sure works better than mine.
With this comes learning to be faithful as well. I had to be a faithful servant and give back to God. I also had to be conservative with what God had given me. Those blessings of love offerings I have always tried to use to God’s glory. It has been through those blessings that I have been able to attend Seminary, debt free!

I could honestly go on and on about faith, not placing any importance on me, however giving GOD the glory! If you are struggling, keep walking in faith, and remember “we live by faith, not by sight.” 2 Corinthians 5:7 (NIV)

Photo credit: hamed

When I was younger I dreamed of what my life would be like in the future. I was looking for my “happily ever after.” Don’t you love those stories and movies that end in “happily ever after?” I know I do, and I wanted to find my “story”.

God loves “happily ever after” stories too. In fact, he’s the author of a bunch of them. In the Bible, the story of queen Esther is a happily ever after story. Have you ever read it? Esther was only a young girl when she became queen, but she was called out by God for a very special purpose and she accomplished a big part in his plan. She saved her people, the Jews. She was prepared to do so by God as she spent time alone with him.

If you want to discover the “happily ever after story” that God is writing for you, you too much spend time with him. When I was a young person I wanted to know the “big picture” I wanted God to show me every piece of the puzzle called “my life”, and he would, but God did so one piece at a time, not all at once. This was not always how I wished he would have done so, but slowly but surely as I spent time with him, I saw each piece as it fit together.

Pieces like breaking up with my long time boyfriend in the middle of my senior year in high school, all began to make sense as I met Mr. Right later that year. In that piece and every other piece of the puzzle called my life God was and is at work. He continues to work as he pieces together the pieces of my life, like bringing friends into my life, blessing me with children, growing my ministry, providing for my family, each piece is strategically placed together by the Father of all, and if I continue to follow him and go to him daily he’ll make this story of my life one that will surely end in those three little works, “happily ever after”.

Photo credit: dreamglow

My mother was not one of those moms who was afraid to educate me about the opposite sex, the birds and the bees, human sexuality, whatever you want to call it.  She wanted to be sure I knew about those things and stayed away from the hurt and pain that participating in sexual activities before I was ready to and before I was in a covenant marriage relationship could cause.

I often say that my mom “drilled it in me” that sex outside of marriage was wrong.  Though back then I often found our chats a little embarrassing and many times I was just plain tired of hearing it today I am thankful that she did.  A few weekends ago I spend some time with some 7th, 8th and 9th grade girls.  What I found out from them was pretty shocking to say the least.  The knowledge in the area of sexual activity for 7th-9th grade girls is quite different in 2009 than it was in 1993-1995, the time period that I was in 7th-9th grade.

Moms, if you’re not already talking to your daughter about sex.  Please begin!  Drill it in them.  Sex is for married couples.  Marriage is designed by God for 1 male and 1 female.  Not 2 females, not 2 males or any other variation.  Moms, did you know that our teen girls today are dealing with bi-sexuality?  I didn’t until a few days ago.

The time to talk to your daughter is NOW!  Whether she is 8 or 18.  Don’t hesitate have that talk today!  Explain to her that sex was created by God and is a beautiful act for a male and female to engage in, inside of a covenant marriage relationship.  Bi-sexuality, homosexuality and any variation besides a relationship between a male and a female is Biblically and morally wrong.

God did not create us with a desire to enter into a sexual relationship with a member of the same sex.  This is not Biblical.  As Christians we will NOT have those urges.  These are all things that your daughter needs to hear.  I know it may sound shocking, but it is true.

As I stand in awe of what these girls know I also stand in fear for them and lift them up to God asking him to protect them from the enemy Satan who is trying to destroy their lives with these things.

Dear Lord,

Please protect the girls of this generation who have much more to deal with than I ever had.  Give their parents the courage and the ability to communicate with them on the topics of sex and marriage and to instill in them Biblical truths.

Lord give these girls the courage to take a stand for what they know is right and to stand against the devil and the temptations that this world put in their path.  Keep them on your path of righteousness.

Amen

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Thanks! ~Kathy

I often enjoy the opportunity to blog about the “overwhelm” I am feeling, that’s because that overwhelming feeling is usually due to God’s love and blessings in my life.  Today, the sense of overwhelm is quite different.  This weekend, I spent some time with a group of 7th – 9th grade girls as I helped out at a Disciple Now Weekend in a local church association which involved several churches.

It was a last minute thing.  I received a call on late Thursday afternoon and ended up volunteering for the weekend.  It was a divine appointment as some might say.  God said, “you need to go minister to these girls.”  I really didn’t know what He was up to, but I knew it was a “God” thing.  And even though the weekend is over, I feel like I ministered to the girls, but I still don’t exactly know what “God was up to.”  There is one thing I do know however, I came away a different person.  I am burdened, my heart is  heavy and I feel a “need” a “need to do something“.

I have been in ministry for years now. I have felt burdened for teens before, but nothing like this.  I cried tears, tears of overwhelm as I said my closing prayer with them during the last Bible study session.  I know that God is much bigger than their problems, but at that moment I felt so small.  I know that I am weak and HE is strong.  And as the sense of overwhelm still hangs over me a few days later, I have to say once again to myself “Jesus loves them this I know, for the Bible tells me so. Little Ones to Him belong. They are weak but He is strong.“ 

Dear Jesus,

I know that you love me and that you love those girls I had the opportunity to share with this weekend.  I know that those 7 girls represent just a small part of your children.  And I know that you love each and every one of your children.  Your children, especially teenagers today are weak Lord and they are hurting.  I am so glad that they belong to you and that you are strong enough to carry their burdens like I wish that I could, but I know that I can’t.  I lift them up to you right now Lord.  You know WHO they are.  Carry them Lord.  Protect them.  Reveal yourself to them.

In Jesus Name

AMEN

Photo Credit: Bracelets by Linda

If you realize nothing else about God, you should realize that He is in control.  And, just when you think you have His plans for your life figured out, or you think you’re able to “control” things then “think again.” God is in control and He likes to be in the driver seat in your life.

I am a control freak.  I’ll admit this.   I like to plan, organize, and know the teeny weeny details about everything.  I do NOT like to “fly by the seat of my pants” and I am not spontaneous.  So, you can see that this lends me to being the type of person who likes to let someone else take the reigns in my life, but with my Lord, it’s a little different.  I know that my God is bigger than my circumstances and I know that He has a plan.

Sometimes, however God is a little bit slower about revealing His plan to me than I would like.  Sometimes He quite honestly takes His own “sweet” time.  And more often than I like to admit I get impatient with that.  Especially when God gives you a peek or a glimpse of what’s to come, or at least so you think, then steers your life off on a detour or side road. 

The thing is it is those “detours” in life that teach us the most.  Most often they are specifically used for a time of growth or maturation.  Without them you wouldn’t be ready for the bumps that are in the road ahead, or for the yield signs or the red lights.  You would be too anxious to get to where you are going to slow down and see the signs.  You’d fly right past them on your path to receive your prize and you’d get hurt along the way.

But, when you allow God to be in the driver seat and you go along for the ride, even for those detours that you don’t appreciate so much at the time, you grow and learn and you are  still eager yet more alert, cautious and focused.  God knew this and that’s why He took you down the path that He did.

So, hopefully at the end of the journey you’re there with Him, allowing Him to be your guide and receiving the prize He had for you at the end of this race we call life.

Photo Credit: jdl_deleon

This morning in Sunday School class we were asked to describe God in one word.  The word that immediately came to my mind is “love” and He is that, however a friend of mine used the word “faithful”, which I can more than agree with.  God is faithful.  Lately this is a description I have seen evident in my life.  God’s faithfulness is evident in each and every day.

Though it is often difficult to live each day by faith, and though it doesn’t seem to get any easier with each day that passes, God doesn’t seem to have the same difficulty being faithful to me.  In fact, He seems to provide for me, be there for me and guide me with ease.  I guess that’s why He’s God and I am only human huh?

These are just my random thoughts today, as I try desperately to provide something for you to think about.  Regardless, I hope that you will think of what God is to you, today, tomorrow, always.  Leave me your thoughts in the comments below.

A phone call with my sister left me wondering what impression I left from my previous post’s stopping point; she seemed to think I was living under a weight of self condemnation and guilt.

Neither couldn’t be farther from the truth, especially where this conversation was concerned.

Was I disappointed my child saw hypocrisy in my faith?   Of course. Was it a surprise that was the origin of Taylor’s loss of respect for me?  Definitely.

I share this story, not because I’m drowning in a riptide of mother guilt, hoping your words will become a life-preserving buoy; instead, I share it because it’s an excellent example of “an adventure in missing the point”.

Recall what I said before–

“What ensued was an eye-opening lesson in how parents can presume wrongly where their children are concerned, and they, in turn, do the same.”

Not only did I inaccurately imagine what Taylor was thinking, even after I was told, I continued temporarily to misunderstand my child’s perspective.

Immediately, I began rattling off a list of how I could see this hypocrisy observed (and judged):  living inconsistently?  offering lip service at the expense of life service?  saying one thing and doing another?

Thankfully, Taylor and I have a relationship that allowed clarification of my confusion without consequence.  And…what (s)he was talking about never even crossed my mind….

Morning devotions…it was about our before-school devotions.

Huh?  What?!  A loss of respect because we had morning devotions?!?

Taylor thought I insisted on this each morning so I could “check it off the list” and because it was the prescribed “Christian thing to do.”

This child has no patience or interest in list checking or obligatory Christian requirements (which I applaud); I was more than a little surprised, though–and honestly, somewhat relieved–this was “all” it was.  While it was disappointing to learn my children saw this as my motive, it gave me opportunity to explain the truth: a) the desire to focus Godward at the beginning of each day; b) to pray (out loud) with and for my kids (or for them to do so for one another); and c) to model by example the priority I place on an intimate, on-going relationship with Christ.

You see, I thought they DID know this!  I presumed it was understood “why” I was committed to a daily morning devotion.

Instead, it was a breeding ground for condemning judgment, misunderstanding and resentment, and loss of parental respect.  Lovely….

As our conversation came to a close, we talked about the judgmental attitude towards me, how that was sinfully seeded, too.  Taylor was glad to have been wrong.

Our transparent conversation was a wonderful opportunity not just to clear the air, but to see through each other’s eyes; it was a reminder not to make assumptions that my children always understand my motives, and that it’s important for them to at this age, so they’re free to respond rightly–not react out of misconception.

As your children move from elementary age to their middle and high school years, I encourage you to create time and space to have uninterrupted conversation; it’s not about quality, it’s about quantity.

Even if you’re just sitting in a parked car in your garage .

Guest Post: This post was originally published on Robin’s Pensieve blog. I am an avid reader of her blog. She is a Godly woman, whom I had the privilege of meeting at She Speaks last summer. She is delightful, fun and a great mom. This post spoke to me and I asked her if I could share it with my readers, she agreed. It has a Part 1 and a Part 2. You’ll have to wait until next week to read Part 2 here on my blog.

Today I was privileged to be the speaker for the first annual Mother-Daughter teas at First Baptist Church, West Point, MS. The ladies did a fabulous job planning and coordinating the event. The tables were beautifully decorated, the snacks and teas delicious and the turnout was wonderful with a great group of 2nd-6th graders and their moms this morning, followed by a even large group of 7th-12th graders and their moms this afternoon.

The topic for both events was beauty from the inside out. I wanted to convey to the girls how they are truly beautiful in God’s sight and that he has a beautiful plan for their lives. That your life is more than just about outer beauty but is about the “perfect will” and plan that he has for them. The role that He has destined for them to play.

I shared with them about being “set apart” and what it would take to do that. With the younger girls we looked at Queen Esther and I had the girls join me in the Tiara Club. With the older girls I used many Scriptures and personal stories to help them understand how to find and follow God’s plan.

One of the most powerful parts of today’s events was the prayer time I encouraged between moms and daughters, in the older girls group I noticed a few tears being shed. Whether the tears were of joy or of sorrow I never feel that tears are a bad thing. God was at work! Amen!

I enjoyed the event thoroughly and know that God did all the work, I’m always amazed to stand to speak for Him at how He completely takes over and speaks through me!

As we begin a new year, as many others are doing I’m sure I’ve been doing some reflecting and planning.  I reflect on the past, not to remember my mistakes, but to remember my victories.  I have been speaking, writing, and ministering as Beauty by Design Ministries since 2005.  This website and blog officially went up in 2006.

Each year since 2006 I have done multiple speaking engagements, which was one of my goals. This past year, 2008, I spoke at the following churches / organizations:

West Carthage Baptist Church, Carthage, MS

Baptist Student Union, Holmes Community College, Goodman, MS

First Baptist Church, Tupelo, MS

Fellowship Church of the Nazarene, Houston, MS

She Speaks Conference, Concord, NC

First United Methodist Church, Senatobia, MS

North Winona Baptist Church, Winona, MS

I have also begun doing a great deal of writing online.  This year I hope to take more of that writing offline as well, as one of my goals is to be published in a well-known Christian publication. For the past couple of years now I have been writing a monthly column for the North Mississippi Christian Family Magazine which I will continue to do as well.

The Lord has placed certain goals and dreams on my heart that I will begin pursuing.  I have seen him work through me in the past and I know he will continue to in the future.  The past couple of years especially have been a result of his love, grace, and faithfulness.

After resigning from my paid church ministry position to live by faith daily and commit myself to this ministry I have seen God provide for us again and again.  I praise and thank Him for doing so, and I give testimony to His provision.

Here’s to another wonderful year!  I look forward to ministering, with you or to you!

Journaling, it isn’t something you hear a lot of people doing anymore. In a day in age where blogging is the hottest thing, taking out a pen and paper to write manually is almost unheard of, doesn’t that take too much time when we can type so much faster? Maybe, but, the benefits can sometimes outweigh the time issue that is involved.

Sure, I love blogging. I am a blogger and I believe blogging has benefits that are quite similar to that which I receive from journaling, but journaling is a bit more private for me, and thus still appropriate for me to engage in because quite frankly I won’t share everything on my blog. A blog after all is almost permanent and can be read by almost anyone who has access to the Internet and the savvy to search for you.

Journaling only the other hand, is just as easy, if not easier than blogging. With journaling you can talk freely, through the written word without fear or reservation. You can scrawl in handwriting commonly known as chicken scratch where it is almost illegible but can be therapeutic in benefits to you. What it looks like doesn’t matter, grammar doesn’t matter. Honestly, it doesn’t even matter if it makes good sense. It is for your benefit and your benefit only. So, what you write frankly does not matter. What does matter is that you write. That you allow the feelings, thoughts and emotions that you feel in your heart and mind to be released onto paper.

With journaling the most important thing is that you do it. You just start writing really, it is as simple as that. Write about how you feel, write about what you are worrying about, write about what you hope to accomplish, or what you wish you could do or be. Write about anything and everything in your life.

Share your prayers, your hopes, your dreams, write letters to yourself or record letters to God. There are so many options and the process can leave you feeling so much better you will definitely want to do it again.

That’s why journaling is a bit addictive. Once you start, most likely, you won’t want to stop. You will begin to fill journal after journal excited about the possibilities of filling those stark white pages with print. It will become a hobby, a true pastime that you continue to enjoy for many years.

If you’re ready to begin journaling check out our FREE 7 Day Journaling Ecourse, and then our 30 Day Journaling Guide.

We would love your opinion as we are making plans to begin work on a new ebook.  We have ideas for 2 different ebooks but hope to make something that is of greatest needs to our readers.  So, which topic would you most benefit from?  If you have any additional comments or questions please leave those in the comments below.  Thank you.

Prayer journaling is something I’ve been doing for over a decade. I began in my early teen years, using it as a way for me to focus the same way I did in my quiet times, or my time alone with God. This was something I was taught to do in youth group at church by my youth minister who encouraged us to do this daily. He told us how much God wanted to spend time with us, and how it was like spending time with a trusted friend. He urged us to carve out time during our busy schedules of talking on the phone, doing homework, going to band practice and long days of school to spend time with our Maker.

Luckily, I listened. I began using the time just before bed every night to do just as my youth minister had inspired me to do. I remember my first prayer journal. My mom stuffed it deep inside my hand-knitted stocking at Christmas that year. I was 15, and had just gone through the worst year of my life. I was just starting high school, my freshman year. I had gone through what was, at that time and still is to this day, my most rebellious phase. Thanks to Godly parents, I was blessed to end those rebellious days right then and there, nipping my rebelliousness in the bud. Their influence and hard discipline steered me back onto the proper path.

Nevertheless, my first prayer journal was filled to the brim as I began my journey, not as a new Christian since I was saved as a young child, but as a revived Christian who finally understood what being Christian meant. It was at this time in my life that I began to understand that being Christian was more than just saying the right prayer, more than just a ticket to heaven, more than just going through the baptismal waters. I realized that it was about a relationship with someone, a very real Someone, the Savior of my life, the one who had died to wash away my sins, and wanted to help me through the ups and downs of life.

He wanted to help me understand why my rebellion was wrong, and He also wanted to give me the hope that I needed to face the days ahead. He wanted to guide me in avoiding the same temptations I had just succumbed to in the days prior and even tougher temptations that were still to come. He was going to be there with me for the long haul. But not only did I need to allow Him to do so, I needed to get to truly know Him. My prayer journal opened that door for me, allowing me to focus and share with someone who already knew me inside and out. I needed to be open to Him for my sake more than His.

This was the only way I was going to get to know Him, truly, deeply, as I needed to in order to be more like Him. I soon discovered this as the ultimate goal of Christianity, though it isn’t a goal we’ll ever fully reach. Our whole lives are a process of becoming more like Him, but it is a journey rather than a destination. We never stop becoming. He, Jesus Christ, is the only person who ever lived that is truly perfect and that’s how it will remain. However, He wants us to be more like Him, to get as close as we humanly can. This is why we continue to live for Him daily. Even though we will never reach perfection, at least not in this life, it is the journey that matters most.

There is, however, one thing we can reach. Through my hand-written journaled prayers, I have seen how God has guided me in every step toward the various milestones and places in my life that He had planned for me. I have seen His hand at work as I have fulfilled some of his plans and purposes for my life. Now, I can look back at a decade of hand-written prayer requests and see how He has slowly, over time, answered them.  Sometimes the answer was yes, and sometimes it was no. Still, sometimes it was sooner, while other times it was later. Nevertheless, He always answered.

It is inspiring to read prayers written during my teen years and realize they were answered even if it was years later. It is even more encouraging to see how God put together the pieces, helping me to yearn for His plan, rather than seeking my own desires. My own plans began to change as I continually poured out my heart to Him on the pages of a journal. At times my cries were quiet, while other times they were passionately desperate. Other times I would praise Him rather than putting out a list of requests, while others entries read more like a wish list than a conversation with my Savior. If you were to read the pages of my journals you would see the peaks and valleys of my relationship with my Lord. You would witness the growth and maturation of my faith. I remain in awe at how far I’ve come and how much different I am now than I was at the young, naive age of 15. Like most teens, I thought I had it all figured out. But now, like most adults, I know that I didn’t. I am thankful that I listened to my youth minister and gave God the time He deserved in my life.

I am also grateful for the blank, white pages of each journal that my mom bought me – each of them empty but filled with amazing potential. They were an open canvas to be filled with my words – words that described my hopes, my fears, my dreams, and my aspirations, all of which I can now see God’s hand in, making my faith in Him today, greater than ever before. All because I took the time to spend some time writing notes to my Savior on the pages of a prayer journal.

Tonight one of the teens from my former youth group graduates from high school. This high school senior will throw his cap in the air and most likely does not have a clue what life has in store for him on the other side of this evening.  He may not realize the importance of the relationships that he has with those other seniors who will stand with him tonight as graduates.

I probably did not either.  I remember my graduation very well.  The day went by quickly and so did the ceremony.  I remember very little of what was said.  I do however remember tossing the cap, hugging my friends, going home for dinner and leaving for summer camp where I was working for the next 8 weeks.  From that day forward to today I have seen my high school friends very little.  It is amazing how quickly time has flown and how little of them I have seen.

Those relationships I had with my classmates I think I took for granted, that or I so naively believed they’d always be there.  However, time has slowly pulled those relationships apart, or at least put distance between us.  Not always negatively, but just as a part of the reality of life.

Most of us have had very fulfilling lives from what I know.  Many of us went off to college, many of us have married, some have had children, others are now expecting.  We have all had to move out of the homes of our parents and into our own places, taking care of our own responsibilities.

What has made this easier is those relationships we have had, both old and new, relationships with each other, our families,  our parents, and the new relationships we’ve formed since high school, with college roommates, colleagues, and others along the way.

All of these relationships are important in their own way because you see God placed them in our path.  He had a hand in each and every one of them.  One might call this divine intervention.  God divinely inspiring those relationships in our lives for just the right time to help fulfill just the right need.  That’s how He works after all.

I think it is important that we treasure those relationships, realizing how important they are to all of us.  Whether they be relationships from our past or those we are presently enjoying they should be treasured because they are a gift from God.

So, whether you’re a high school senior about to throw your cap in the air, or someone who has been in the real world a long time.  Look around you, count those relationships you have or have had and treasure them in your heart.

Many times people don’t understand what it means to be “called by God”. They believe that being called out by God is reserved only for those people who feel called to ministry, such as youth ministers, pastors, music ministers, and missionaries. However, God calls us all out to do something for Him. Yes, we all equally receive this call on our lives.

First, He calls us to Himself. God’s call to salvation is the first call He makes upon our lives. The salvation given to us through His Son Jesus’ death on the cross is a free gift that we must choose to accept.

Then, God sends the Holy Spirit to live inside of us and with His presence comes spiritual gifts that God gives us to us e to bring glory and honor to Him. God may also call us to do things that we may not feel we have the power or ability to do but He will enable us to do through Him if we just try.

Throughout time God has called many people to do things for Him that felt inadequate and ill prepared to do what God worked through them to accomplish. We can experience the same thing. For through him we become stronger, wiser and more useful.

We are all truly “called” by God!

For this upcoming week in my weekly email to my list subscribers, Mom-Daughter Connection, I spoke of the importance of prayer. I truly believe in the power of prayer and believe that you can pray about anything. The Bible tells us we are to “cast all our cares upon Him, because He cares for you.” 1 Peter 5:7 (KJV)

The Lord truly wants us to bring our burdens and cares to him through prayer. We are to pray about everything, pray without ceasing.

Here are some things to pray about:

1. Everyday life situations. You can pray about your finances, your health, your kid’s grades, your teen’s peer pressure, your job. LIFE! God understands and He wants you to come to Him with it all.

2. For others. Pray for others, intercession is a privelege and we should always intercede on the behalf of others whether they have asked us to or not, whether they are sick, in need or you just want to thank God for them.

3. The future. Yes, it’s uncertain to us, but God knows all about it, praying for God’s will in our lives will help us to find the future that is best for us. The right path!

4. Thanksgivings. We don’t want to just ASK God for things, we want to take time to THANK HIM for things as well. Thank God for the many blessings he has given you and your family!

5. Your feelings. God can handle it. Feel angry? PRAY, Hurt? PRAY, Guilty? PRAY. Prayer is always a good answer to how you are feeling.

Still feeling unsure? Purchase our My Heart to His Prayer Journaling Devotional Guide to learn more about prayer and prayer journaling.

Over at another of my sites today I shared about Showing Your Passion. I hope you’ll take a few minutes to go over, read the post and comment.

This is the third in a series of posts on Stewardship to read the first post click here, and the second is located here.

God gives us many gifts, including those of the fruit of the spirit. He also gives us spiritual gifts, a gift that comes to individual believers to supernaturally enable them to do that which God has called them to do.

Using our spiritual gifts is another way that we can give back to God, another way that we can commit a spiritual act of worship.

Spiritual gifts are often confused with natural talents. Let me explain the differences.

· Spiritual Gift is from God, independent of parents.
· Natural Talent is from God, but through parents.
· Spiritual Gifts are from new birth.
· Natural Talents are from birth.
· Spiritual gifts are to benefit others on a spiritual level.
· Natural gifts are to benefit others on a natural level. When used alongside spiritual gifts this can be a spiritual benefit.
· Spiritual gifts we recognize, develop and exercise them in His power.
· Natural gifts we recognize, develop and exercise in your own power, through training, practice.
· Spiritual gifts are dedicated to God fro his use and glory.
· Natural talents are dedicated by believers to God for his use and glory, but not necessarily always.

Spiritual gifts are also different from those fruit of the spirit we spoke of earlier. The difference here is that Spiritual gift has to do with service, what you do.
Fruit of the spirit is in your character, what comes out of you, as a result of God’s work in you.

Every believers gift is essential to the proper functioning of the body of Christ.

This is why God calls us also to be good “stewards” of those gifts he has given to us. There are gifts for everyone, and every believer has a gift he is given to use to glorify God. There are gifts of service, mercy, giving, healing, leadership, teaching, discernment, shepherding, witnessing, and evangelism. We could talk for hours about spiritual gifts. But, the important thing to remember here is once you’ve discovered what yours is, and you do this by seeking God and my being willing to serve him and others. You then need to use your gift in your local church to glorify God.

Then, there are those natural talents we spoke of. Natural talents such as the ability to sing, or draw, maybe even play a sport. Those natural talents are also given to us by God. These natural talents may not always be used for God’s glory, unlike spiritual gifts one can use their natural talents or abilities for their own gain, or praise. I’m sure you can think of famous people who have done this and selfishly sought success, wealth, popularity, whatever the case may be. However, you can use your natural talents for God’s glory as well and to lead others to God as a result.

How many of you watched last season’s American Idol. Were you Mandisa fan’s? Mandisa publically confessed her faith in Jesus on stage in front of millions of Americans. After being voted off of American Idol Mandisa did not stop glorifying God. Soon she will release an album “True Beauty” in the Christian music circuit. She is a perfect example of using your “talent” to glorify God.

I challenge you to use whatever talent, gift or ability you have for God and for his glory.

Read about my confirmation that what I do hear with Beauty by Design Ministries truly matters. Visit my personal blog to find out more. Click here to read today’s blog.

Have you ever given your testimony? You might ask, “What is my testimony?” Dictionary.com defined testimony as a “public declaration of faith.” This morning at my church it was Baptist Men’s Sunday. We are Southern Baptist and the men in my church have a group that they formed called Baptist Men. It is a mission’s type group that supports missions projects and missionaries monetarily and they meet once a quarter I believe for breakfast and devotional time. This morning however they were in charge of the whole service and the men, led in music, played the instruments, we had an all men’s choir, etc. Plus, three men gave their testimonies. Each man’s testimony I noticed was very different.

One man had been raised in what he called a dysfunctional family and by the grace of God was finally taken care of by his grandmother who took him to church and he was saved at the age of 16. He recalled his choice to take the wrong path during his teenage years where he basically did what he pleased without much adult supervision from his parents. He also told of his close calls with death having walked away from 2 near fatal car accidents and 1 major motorcyle accident that should have left him for dead, but has he said, God had other plans. He also, testified that now God has replaced all the bad things of his past with the good things he now enjoys in his adult, Christian life. A loving wife, 2 great boys, a loving extended family and church family who he knows he could call on at anytime.

The second man’s testimony was slightly different in that he had been in church his whole life and was a living testimony of someone who had always known and loved having a church home and church family. He now truly appreciates this as his wife has been very ill and he has realized that without the Lord and his Christian friends he could have never made it through all that they have.

The third and final testimony was of a man who had been saved at a young age but chose to take the wrong path in life for quite some time, marrying at 17 because he got his girlfriend pregnant and then living a life of alcoholism for many years, until he finally got his life back on track after his middle child brought his a Bible study type book which he read while on the road as a truck driver. Now, he and his family are all saved and in church faithfully.

What about you, how would you give your testimony? What would it include? I think it is important for us all to know and be willing to share our testimony of our Christian lives. It is easy to form your testimony. You include three main points.
1. Your Life Before Christ. – Were you deep in sin, or just a young child who knew something was missing in your life?
2. Your Salvation Experience. – How you came to know the Lord.
3. Your Life After Christ. How has it changed? What have you learned about God’s grace, love and mercy?

Finally, the most important thing is that you share your testimony with others. That is what it is for, to proclaim the good news of Jesus Christ.

Memorizing Scripture is something I have done and been encouraged to do since I was a child. I was in Bible drills as a child and into my teen years. I have used this more than I can even tell you throughout my life, so I feel that memorizing Scripture is a must and definitely worthwhile and fulfilling. I share this with my listeners this week on Show # 10 of Mom-Daughter Connection Radio Show & Podcast. I hope you will have a listen.

Ok, so maybe it’s just my idea, but today I began a “cross-blog conversation” with another Christian business woman here online, Regina Baker of Business by Grace, who believes in Christian business owners doing “business by the BOOK without compromise”.

She and I are exchanging questions and conversation via one of our blogs. I am using my newest blog, Writer for Hire Blog, a site for my writing and Regina is using her Business by Grace Blog. See our conversation or the beginnings of it here, where I asked Regina about her typical morning routine. In her answer I noticed that she talks to her mom every morning, something I have always done since marrying, until this year, however it is because of circumstances out of both of our control (an earlier work schedule for her, taking my son to school for me) . I feel that a close relationship with another Godly woman in our lives helps to improve our understanding of being a strong Christian Titus 2 woman. After all Titus 2:3-5 teaches us to,

” be reverent in the way they live, not to be slanderers or addicted to much wine, but to teach what is good. Then they can train the younger women to love their husbands and children, to be self-controlled and pure, to be busy at home, to be kind, and to be subject to their husbands, so that no one will malign the word of God.”

How else will we learn but by example, by others showing us the way. For me that was my mother, and still is, before that, my mother did the same for her, and my grandmother had the same thing done for her by her mother. In fact, even growing up I remember my mother talking to her grandmother on the phone daily. I try to talk to my mom’s mother on the phone weekly, though I don’t manage every day, I wish I could.

A special connection between a mom and a daughter, in my opinion it is a link to a special relationship with our Heavenly Father. We are taught by example, we learn by example, it is the “trickle down theory”. We influence one generation, which influences the next, which influences the next, you get the picture.

What are you trickling down to your daughter today?

If you enjoy reading our blog you can subscribe to it in your feedreader by clicking the orange link at the top of the sidebar on your right.

This is a special sale to encourage all you ladies out there to journal and to get your daughters journaling. Pick up this very special journal set for just $14. You pick the journal you would like, and receive not one but two special gifts with your journal, Alyssa’ Prayer Journal Devotional Guide, and a designer pen. This package is worth over $25 RETAIL and you will receive it all for $14, including shipping. ***EDITED: This offer is extended through the end of 2007! ****
Click on a photo to view it larger. Select your choice of journals below. Please allow 2 weeks for delivery.

Small Roses

Bordered Rose

Red & Gold

Big Flowers

Bird

Large Roses

Journaling is a pastime I have always enjoyed. From journaling my hopes and dreams as a teenager to journaling my doubts and fears as an adult, journaling has been a part of my life for quite some time. I received my first journal in my Christmas stocking as a young preteen. My mom knew I loved to write even back then, and so she bought me a beautiful flowered journal for me to begin writing in. I filled it to the brim and needed a new one by the next year. This started a tradition of my getting a journal in my stocking each year.

Journaling became an almost constant in my life, sure I got out of the habit from time to time, but I always seem to slip back into it. It is almost as if I yearn for it, and the feeling that it gives me. If I don’t do it for a while, I begin to get cravings, or feel withdrawal.

The greatest joy that I get out of journaling is when I journal my prayers and then, I am able to look back on those prayers days, months and maybe even years later (I’ve done this) and see the results, the answered prayers, the prayers God said “No” to or “Wait” and I’m able to understand why certain things happened the way that they did and I truly appreciate the circumstances more.

I encourage everyone to journal. Maybe you won’t make it a daily habit, but I hope you’ll do it often enough to appreciate it. Need a journal? Pick one up for a limited time in this special offer. Also, Take a look at my gift boxes, maybe you will want to even buy one for yourself!

Mom-Daughter Connection Ezine
Issue 28, September 3, 2007©

Hello Everyone!

I know I told you all I wouldn’t be sending out an ezine this week, but I have something so exciting to tell you about I just couldn’t wait. If you haven’t read my blog at Mom-Daughter Connection or Beauty By Design Online then you don’t know about it, so head over to http://beautybydesignonline.com to find out what I’m talking about.

I’m having a very special guest on an upcoming episode of Mom-Daughter Connection Radio Show and Podcast and I want to know what you’d like me to ask her… I’ll be interviewing her for the September 25th episode so send me your questions now to alyssa@beautybydesignonline.com or leave them in the comments section of the announcement post on my website.

This week ladies, I will be on vacation! Whoo hoo! My hubby, son, daughter and I are going to be heading to Gatlinburg, TN. Check in on Tuesday, September 11 to hear a new podcast at http://mom-daughterconnection.com

If you enjoyed reading “Heart to Heart: Mom-Daughter Connection”™ please pass it on to a friend or colleague. They can easily subscribe by visiting our sign up page on our website
http://www.beautybydesignonline.com/opt_in.html or by sending a blank email to 487@wahmcart.com

Blessings,
~Alyssa Avant, Founder, Beauty By Design Ministries
www.beautybydesignonline.com

Article

Some Keys to Quiet Time

Quiet time or time alone with God is so important to all of us. I believe that it is how we as Christians grow in Christ. Becoming a Christian should be more to us than just “fire insurance” or a way to stay out of hell. I think it is important to emphasize to our children that being a Christian involves more than just accepting Jesus. It is about forming and growing a “relationship” with God. As a youth/children’s minister, I used this example many times. If you have any relationship, whether it is with a friend, a parent, a boyfriend/girlfriend, how do you get to know that person, through spending time with them right? And if you don’t spend time with them you cannot “get to know them”. The same goes with our relationship with God. We must spend time with Him in order to get to know Him, and there is no way that we will get to know Him if we do not spend time with Him. It is that simple. That is why our quiet time is so important.

The Christian life is a growth process, in order to grow we must spend time reading God’s word, talking to God, listening to God, memorizing Scripture, applying Scripture to our lives, all of these things we can do during our quiet time with God each day. There are some several “keys” to having a quiet time; I would like to briefly share some of them with you.

Keys to Quiet Time:

?Find a special place to have it.
?Bring your Bible, pen, paper and an open mind.
?Set aside a specific time each day.
?Be prepared to hear from God.
This is just the beginning of how to have a quiet time. I would love for you to join Cindy Rushton and I at the Talk-A-Latte chat on Tuesday, May 29, at 1 pm CST where will be discussing quiet times.

Upcoming Chat

Quiet Times
A Talk-a-Latte Chat
With Alyssa Avant and Cindy Rushton
We are having a FUN Talk-a-Latte Chat on Tuesday afternoon, May 29, 2007. Plan now to join us for Talk-a-Latte Chat!
Here are the chat details:
Make Plans NOW!
Tuesday, May 29, 2007
FREE!
11:00 AM Pacific Time
12:00 PM Mountain Time
1:00 PM Central Time
2:00 PM Eastern Time
Free! Just grab a headset (or get those speakers plugged in!)
and get ready for a WONDERFUL afternoon!

http://www.cindyrushton.com/Conference.exe

Click to begin download or copy/paste into your internet browser and click
ENTER. It will only take a few minutes to download into your computer, but
you want to do it ahead of time so you don’t miss a minute in the Conference
Room.
After it is downloaded on your computer, it will set up an icon on your
desktop that says CONFERENCE. Then, you will only have to click it to open
up the room. Here are your instructions from there:
When you are ready to enter, you will enter your NAME or EMAIL ADDRESS in
the first blank.
This is a FREE download and will not take up alot of space on your computer.

Free Letter

I wanted to apologize to all my “brand new” subscribers who received a “welcome” letter this week that promised that they would receive the letter “A Letter to a Princess: You Are My Precious Daughter” . This was my old ‘freebie” for signing up for my ezine. However, I want to share this with my new subscribers as well. Therefore if you would like this letter, you may pick it up at http://www.beautybydesignonline.com/Microsoft%20Word%20-%20You-Are-My-Precious-Daughter.pdf
Thanks again for joining and WELCOME!

Ad Exchange

WANT YOUR AD HERE?
Exchange ads with me, up to 25 words. For more info or to place your ad here
space, contact Alyssa: Alyssa@beautybydesignonline.com

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Tell a Friend

If you enjoyed reading “Heart to Heart: Mom-Daughter Connection”™ please pass it on to a friend or colleague.

They can easily subscribe by visiting our sign up page on our website
http://www.beautybydesignonline.com or by sending a blank email to 487@wahmcart.com

About Alyssa

Alyssa Avant is a Christian author, speaker, and business owner whose desire is to turn the hearts of girls towards God. Alyssa lives happily in Carrollton, Mississippi with her devoted husband, Greg, 3-year-old son, Baker, newborn baby girl, Lily, and beloved basset hound, Duke.

This ezine is published weekly by Beauty By Design Ministries founder, Alyssa Avant as a service to moms of girls of all ages.
PO Box 92
Carrollton, MS 38917
alyssa@beautybydesignonline.com

I thought it would be neat to share my notes with you that I use when speaking to girls. Recently I spoke to the girls at Holcomb Baptist Church in Holcomb, MS on self-confidence. I then did my Mom-Daughter Connection Radio Show #5 on that same topic. I thought I’d share my notes with you from this. Here they are:

What makes you feel really good about yourself? A new outfit, a new haircut, a compliment from a friend, knowing you got A on that paper, making a goal in soccer? Whatever it is, is it lasting? Do you still feel good about yourself a week later? On the other hand, are you like me and your confidence fades and then you feel down in the dumps and can’t figure out what’s wrong with yourself?

I experienced this feeling just this week. I had a big success last Friday that made me feel most accomplished and on cloud 9. Then, Monday hit and I was finding myself down in the dumps. I couldn’t really explain it and it wasn’t until this Friday that I realized my problem. Maybe my problem with confidence is yours too.

Let me explain to you what my problem was. I was looking for my confidence in the wrong place. You see earthly rewards and recognition will never truly satisfy us if we are Christians.

“So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal.” 2 Corinthians 4:18

“Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moth and rust do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal. Matthew 6:18-20

God did not create us to be satisfied with earthly rewards. There is a God-shaped hole in our lives that only God can fill. First, if you do not have a relationship with Jesus Christ, meaning you have admitted your sins, repented, confessed that you believe that Jesus died on the cross to save you from your sins and asked Jesus to be Lord of your life. Then, you have yet to fill that God shaped hole. If you have accepted Jesus, then that isn’t all that is required. In order to keep that God shaped hole filled you must nurture your relationship with God.

What does it mean to nurture? Well as women we are created by God to be nurtures we take care of people right, your mom takes care of you, your dad, your family, and your home right? Well to nurture something is to take care of it so that it will grow. Farmers nurture their crops, animals nurture their young, parents nurture their children and we can nurture our relationship with God.

How many of you have a “relationship” with someone? A friend, a boyfriend, a parent, a grandparent? We all have a relationship of some kind. How do you maintain that relationship? You spend time with that person right? Well in order to maintain and grow your relationship with Christ you have to spend time with him.

Growing your relationship with God requires spending that time with Him. Just as if we want to grow up physically, we need to grow up spiritually. One of the main differences in growing physically and in growing spiritually is that it takes much more effort on your part to grow spiritually.
You must make it a priority to spend time in prayer and Bible study, spend time praising God, thanking God and waiting to hear from God.

After all, what’s wrong with us when we get down in the dumps and woe is me is that it isn’t really and shouldn’t really be ALL about us.

You see, God didn’t create us for us to be self-centered and all about me. Because the truth is, it’s all about God. You were born for a purpose. Yes, God has a significant, meaningful, purpose for your life. We typically don’t understand this because like you’ve heard so many people in today’s society say, you are asking the wrong question… most of us and most of the people in the world today are asking this question:

What do I want to be? What should I do with my life?

When we should be asking- what did God create me to be?

People are out there trying to “find themselves” when they should be focusing on God and his will for their lives.

As Rick Warren, author of the Purpose Driven Life states, “You were made by God and for God – until you understand that, life will never make sense.” “Focusing on ourselves will never our life’s purpose.”

I know what it’s like; I know what you are probably thinking. You want to know what that purpose is right?

If you’re like I was at your age then you do. I was curious, I still am. I wanted to know it all. I couldn’t wait to find out what was next. I wanted to know the “big picture”. I still do. I wanted to know who I was going to marry. How many kids I would have? Where I would live? On and On.

God will reveal those purposes to you and he has big plans for your life. “I know the plans I have for you declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a hope and a future.” Jeremiah 29:11

God knows you better than anyone else. After all, he created you right? “He knit you together in your mother’s womb.” You are “fearfully and wonderfully made”. You are not an accident. Way before your mom or dad even thought about having you. God was making plans for your birth. He chose your race, the color of your skin, you hair and every other feature. He also gave you talents and abilities.

The Bible also tells us God made you for a specific reason. “ You saw me before I was born.
Every day of my life was recorded in your book.
Every moment was laid out
before a single day had passed.” Psalm 139:16

God knows what that plan is know don’t you want to know. Trust God with your life, every single part of it, put it in his hands. Allow him to mold it, shape it, form it, and set you on the path he has for you. It will be the greatest ride of your life.

You know I told you when I was a teenager I wanted to know God’s plan, the big picture, I could have never dreamed it up. What God has given me. God did it, I could try to take credit for it myself, the blessings I have experienced, but I can’t. It’s all God. If you remember that it’s all about HIM and not about YOU, but that he has many blessings and plans in store for you, then your confidence will soar. You will not only be happy, but you will have JOY. Joy comes from God. Joy is spiritual peace, peace that passes all understanding.

Do not worry. Learn to pray about everything. Give thanks to God as you ask Him for what you need. 7 The peace of God is much greater than the human mind can understand. This peace will keep your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:6-7

I heard recently of a new twist on scrapbooking that I thought I would share with all of you. I was excited to hear about it and am considering starting one myself. The concept is to scrapbook your spiritual journey, the highs and lows, the mountaintop experiences and the valley experiences. They are both important and think how wonderful it would be to be able to look back over that scrapbook and see what you had come through.

Since this is something new to me I did some research online. One website calls this Faithbooking and gives you a weekly challenge to complete to do your book. You can find more info on faithbooking here.

However you choose to begin I believe that Scrapbooking your spiritual walk, or Faithbooking would be a worthwhile experience and one you could enjoyably share with your teen or tween girl.

I am currently reading an awesome book/study manual by Dr. Rick Warren who wrote The Purpose Driven Life: What on Earth Am I Here For? (Purpose Driven Life). If you haven’t read it you should, but I am now reading his book Rick Warren’s Bible Study Methods: Twelve Ways You Can Unlock God’s Word“. This book is proving to be quite an amazing study tool for my Bible study time. I liked it so much I thought, hey why don’t I share this with the reader’s of Mom-Daughter Connection and my Beauty by Design Ministry followers. So here’s a little taste of what I’ve learned so far.

There are some steps you should take in Bible Study, which more often than not we probably are guilty of not doing. Here they are:

1. Observing: seeing the facts.
2. Asking Questions: discovering additional facts.
3. Interpreting: analyzing what the text means.
4. Correlating: the Bible truths you know and cross referencing them with other verses in Scripture.
5. A conclusion: applying to your life in a practical way the truths you have studied.

This is just some of what I am getting from this book, I will be sharing more later, so check back. I’d also love to hear about your Bible study methods or books or tools you use to help with your study time. Leave them in the comment section below.

I will be speaking at a 2 night Stewardship Clinic at Durant Baptist Church in Durant, MS to the 10-17 year old girls. Topics will be how to give of yourself, your time, your talents and your money to the Lord. Thank you Pastor Nathaniel Christian for this opportunity. I am looking forward to it.

Issue 17, June 25, 2007©

Contents
1. Note from Alyssa
2. Article
3. Special Announcement
4. Contest
5. Ad Exchange
6. Tell a Friend
7. About Alyssa

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Note from Alyssa
Hello Everyone!
Wow what a week! Anyone of you who has ever worked in Vacation Bible School knows what I mean! We had VBS this week at church. I taught the 4 year olds. Thirteen very rambunctious, energy filled ones at that, and let me tell you the ironic thing. All but three of them were BOYS! I think God definitely has a sense of humor, let me tell you why. When I started my youth ministry position, I walked in to the youth room that first Sunday morning to all boys! Then, this week I have 10 little boys under my care rather than girls. Maybe that is why a girl’s ministry is so dear to me, I rarely get a chance to be around them.
There were two teenage girls who helped me this week and I was glad to have them around. They sure did help me out! I am so proud that their parents saw fit to encourage them to work in VBS. Encouraging your daughter to get involved in ministry is so important. Read on to learn more about this topic.
There are so many exciting things happening here at Beauty By Design Ministries, with the contest running, the radio show on it’s way and the many new subscribers to the ezine I’m bubbling over with excitement. I want to share that excitement with you so make sure you read to the end of this email to find out about a very special offer!

Blessings,
~Alyssa Avant, Founder, Beauty By Design Ministries
www.beautybydesignonline.com
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Article
Do you encourage your daughter or any of your children to get up and go to church even when they beg to stay home? Do you encourage them to “do their best” even when they don’t feel like it? Do you encourage them to “be nice to others” even when those people are rude to them?
We as parents are responsible for teaching our children what is important in life. Encouragement is a way that we can teach them in a loving way what is right and wrong. Encouraging them to do what is right is the key. Also, discouraging or disciplining their wrong actions is important.
Encouragement is the expression of support or concern. Don’t you want your daughter to feel that you support her or have concern for her? This type of encouragement requires consistency. It is essential for a child’s confidence in you and their belief that you mean what you say. I can remember times in my teens when I wished that my parents would give in and not follow through with their punishment, which most of the time was grounding, but they would not give in even a few days early. What made this good? I knew that they would always keep their word to me. They proved this by doing so even when it was tough. I know this because I now find it difficult to stand my ground when I punish my own child.
How about you are you consistent in your punishment as well as your encouragement of your child? Remember, “No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it” (Hebrews 12:11).
Your daughter trained by your encouragement and punishment will begin to be shaped into a person of Godly character and that will matter most in the days ahead.

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Special Announcement
The Podcast Launch is Fast Approaching
Mom-Daughter Connection is launching on Tuesday, July 3! It now has its own home on the web, located at http://www.mom-daughterconnection.com Check it out! This is where the show will be posted each week for you to listen to online or download to your MP3 player to take with you!
The show will be done bi-weekly. One change has been made as well. We will only be having the one show, Mom-Daughter Connection Radio Show. We have decided that we want to only focus on the one show to make it the best ever!
The Mom-Daughter Connection Radio Show will be dedicated to helping Christian moms and their tween and teen girls to connect and communicate with each other on those tough and touchy topics that they may struggle with. Listen in each week to help your daughter on everything from modesty to career choice.
Mom Daughter Connection’s first show will be a testimony of how Alyssa decided to created her ministry and of God’s calling on her life. You the listeners will be able to get to know Alyssa a little better before you listen to her tips and advice on the topics near and dear to you and your daughter.
<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<
Contest
DON’T MISS OUT ON THIS! I have had several new subscribers but only 1 who has emailed me with the name of her referrer. She and her referrer are the only ones in the drawing so far! Get your NAME in NOW!

Announcing Mom-Daughter Connection’s biggest contest EVER!
The goal is to get as many new subscribers to the list before the launch of the Mom-Daughter Connection Radio Show on July 3, only 2 weeks away. You can help and you will be rewarded for your efforts.
The person who refers the most subscribers to our list will receive
a FREE Mini Spa Party in a Box valued at $35.
You can throw a great Summer Spa Bash with your daughter and some friends when you win this awesome prize. Read about the box here: http://www.beautybydesignonline.com/spa-party-in-a-box/

The prize will be given away on our first Mom Daughter Connection Radio Show /
Podcast on Tuesday, July 3.

NOTE: Subscribers you refer will have to email me saying that you referred them in order to qualify.

Use the following email to easily tell your friends about the contest.

Dear INSERT YOUR FRIENDS NAME HERE,
I’m sending you this email because there is a great contest going on at www.beautybydesignonline.com right now. She’s got a Christian site for Teens and Tweens and their moms and I thought of you. Join her mailing list now and together we could win http://www.beautybydesignonline.com/opt_in.html . It’s free to join and she’ll be giving away the prize on her podcast just for us moms on July 3rd. See you there!

Ad Exchange

WANT YOUR AD HERE?
Exchange ads with me, up to 25 words. For more info or to place your ad here
space, contact Alyssa: Alyssa@beautybydesignonline.com

SPECIAL OFFER: Email me at alyssa@beautybydesignonline.com to purchase a very special Prayer Journal Package available only to my subscribers and not found on my website. This package includes a “My Heart to His Prayer Journal Devotional Guide” and a beautiful spiral bound prayer journal for only $14.99 !!! Email me for a SNEAK PEAK picture and to order! I will send you a Paypal Invoice or Call you to take your Credit Card Number! Don’t miss out this offer will be available until the launch of my radio show date only, JULY 3!!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Tell a Friend

If you enjoyed reading “Heart to Heart: Mom-Daughter Connection”™ please pass it on to a friend or colleague.

They can easily subscribe by visiting our sign up page on our website
http://www.beautybydesignonline.com/opt_in.html or by sending a blank email to 487@wahmcart.com
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

About Alyssa

Alyssa Avant is a Christian author, speaker, and business owner whose desire is to turn the hearts of girls towards God. Alyssa lives happily in Carrollton, Mississippi with her devoted husband, Greg, 3-year-old son, Baker, newborn baby girl, Lily, and beloved basset hound, Duke.

This ezine is published weekly by Beauty By Design Ministries founder, Alyssa Avant as a service to moms of girls of all ages.
PO Box 92
Carrollton, MS 38917
alyssa@beautybydesignonline.com

The Mom Daughter Connection Radio Show & Podcast is coming very soon! We will launch with our first episode on Tuesday, July 3. This episode will be a Testimony of Alyssa’s Call to Ministry and to starting Beauty By Design Ministries. It will also feature how God has grown Beauty By Design Ministries , where Alyssa is now, where she is going in the future with her ministry and how that relates to you our listeners. You won’t want to miss this powerful testimony of God’s working in her life!

This is Alyssa doing what she does best, speaking at Promised Quartet’s Memorial Day Sing in Coila, MS.

In My Daughter’s Eyes
By Martina McBride

In my daughter’s eyes I am a hero
I am strong and wise and I know no fear
But the truth is plain to see
She was sent to rescue me
I see who I wanna be
In my daughter’s eyes

In my daughter’s eyes everyone is equal
Darkness turns to light and the
world is at peace
This miracle God gave to me
gives me strength when I am weak
I find reason to believe
In my daughter’s eyes

And when she wraps her hand
around my finger
Oh it puts a smile in my heart
Everything becomes a little clearer
I realize what life is all about

It’s hangin’ on when your heart
has had enough
It’s giving more when you feel like giving up
I’ve seen the light
It’s in my daughter’s eyes

In my daughter’s eyes I can see the future
A reflection of who I am and what will be
Though she’ll grow and someday leave
Maybe raise a family
When I’m gone I hope you see how happy
she made me
For I’ll be there
In my daughter’s eyes

As many of you may already know, I recently gave birth to a daughter. I had dreams of having a little girl of my own for a long time. I think this is just a natural dream for most women. I love the above song by Martina McBride and as I listened to it recently, I for the first time could relate to it. I truly want to be a “hero” to my daughter. I want to be her best friend like my mom is for me. I want for her to be proud to be my daughter. Her presence in my life does give me a new outlook. It makes me realize why my future is important. It is important because it affects her future.

When I get caught up in the hum drum of the daily grind, all it takes is a smile from her to bring me back to what is truly important. The dishes can wait, the laundry can pile up, none of that matters more than quality time with her.

I also know that within her life lies my future, as she will be a part of my life each and everyday of my future, nothing can be more important than that. Her own life will be a representation of myself; now is the time that I can help mould her character.

How about you? Are you aware of the fact that you are shaping who your daughter becomes and that the person she becomes will be a representation of you long after you are gone? I’d love to hear how this makes you feel, what you think of this topic. Please leave your comments!

Recently, I was interviewed by Chanda Stegall, owner of TeachKidstheBible.com. Her mission through this website is to provide parents with resources and tools that will equip them to teach their own children the Bible. She interviewed me about prayer journaling. A topic that is near and dear to my heart. Click Here to listen to the interview.

Beauty By Design Ministries Presents a new Special Report: “Seven Easy Tips: Encouraging Your Daughter to Pray”. If you would like to learn more about this special report and how you can get your own copy CLICK HERE. It’s FREE! Here is what one mom had to say after reading it,

I have created a survey for all moms with daughters to take at the following link, Beauty By Design Ministries Survey. This survey will help me to get to know you as a mom better and the needs that you have and the problems that you face with your daughter so that I can be able to minister to you more effectively. I appreciate your taking the time to take this survey. Thank you! Blessings to all.

It’s that time of year, hearts are racing as they anticipate that ever fateful day, Graduation. I remember it like it was yesterday. I could NOT wait for that last song to be played and for my hand to release that cap into the air. What a feeling of exhiliration, excitement, and a little nerves all mixed into one. For one, you had accomplished a great feat. But, on the other hand, those carefree days of high school and no responsibilities were over. A new life lies ahead of you, stretched out like the open road, ready for you to take a drive. It will be full of roadblocks, traffic jams, and detours that is for certain. The choices you make and map you choose to follow will determine where you will end up. Hasty decisions will lead to dead ends. This is your life we’re talking about, so you want to choose your destination wisely. How do you guarantee that you’ll end up in the fast lane, successful, and happy? Well, there really is no guarantee of success if you look at it by the world’s standards, however, if you look at life through the eyes of God and see it as opportunities He is giving you, then you will always feel like you’re a winner. The Bible says, “Many are the plans in a man’s heart, but it is the LORD’s purpose that prevails.” Proverbs 19:21 You can make your plans, however God’s purpose for your life will prevail if you will follow Him, look to Him, and obey Him.

When I was trying to make those decisions about my future, it was difficult. There were so many choices to make, choices about college, career, marriage, would I get a summer job, or move away from home? These decisions are never easy to make, however, we all have a link to the answers, or at least to some wisdom to help choose the best answer. This link is prayer, our lifeline to God. Choosing to go to Him with your decisions is the first step to making the right choices for your life. Matthew 7:7-8 reads, “Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives; he who seeks finds; and to him who knocks, the door will be opened.” These verses back up my suggestion that seeking God’s help is the best way to go.

One of my best suggestions for anyone who wants to see how God works in your own life, is to begin recording your prayers in a journal. Writing down your requests, concerns, and thoughts is not only helpful to make one feel better, sort of a therapy for the worried, but it also is a rewarding experience to be able to return to those prayers after God has so graciously answered them, days, weeks or years down the road. You can then rejoice in the many blessings that God has given you. You will be astonished at all He truly gives you, and I guarantee it will be more than what you asked for.

A prayer journal devotional guide, with journal, scripture bookmark and pen is available as a gift box here on my website. Check it out! It will make the perfect graduation gift.

Join the WAH Expo Blog Tour!

Business and Learning’s Work at Home Expo is a virtual event providing a venue for home based business opportunity presentations during the day and high powered business learning opportunities each evening. The creators and volunteers of the Work at Home Expo will be visiting the blog’s of fellow work at home entrepreneurs the week prior to the famous Work At Home Expo coming May 7- 12th.

Starting Monday April 30th, we will be visiting blogs that belong to Work at Home Entrepreneurs to answer some of their business related questions, leaving comments and feedback.

Here are just a few areas of expertise that are covered:

Wendy Cooper is a graphic designer, virtual assistant, and wordpress guru that enjoys using her talents and skills to help make work easier for you.

Tammy Munson is a new media & technology specialist who is eager to answer your questions about how to integrate new media(blogging, podcasting and video) into your existing business.

Amanda Hamm is a Business Coach to Work at Home Moms, wordpress fanatic, and advertising and promotions adviser who would also like to help you to strengthen your skills to create a positive cash flow.

I am taking part in their Blog Tour. I am asking Wendy the following question “Where can I find the stats for my block on my Wordpress dashboard?”

Thanks for the assistance. Glad to be apart of the tour.

Group dating sounds like a good idea right? It probably sounds safer, less intimidating, less tempting to be intimate, more fun and less pressure. Right?? Maybe, but maybe not, as a teenager I often group dated with my boyfriend and some friends. In my experience most of what was expected of a group date was not true. Sure it was fun sometimes, especially when you go for a round of bowling or goofy golf, in those cases the more the merrier. But what about when the group’s choice is to attend a party with alcohol and you feel left out because you don’t drink and maybe even don’t want to attend. Or perhaps they want to watch a movie at one of the group’s houses, sounds harmless right. Well, let me tell you about my experience.

I was 17, my boyfriend and I had been dating for 2 years. We were on a “group date” where we were going to one of the guys houses to watch a movie. They decided to watch it in the guys bedroom and all wanted to get in the bed together and “make out”. I was NOT going to do this. Not only did I get into a bad situation of temptation but I also was being pressured by my friends to participate. It was not a good situation nor did it leave me with a good feeling about group dates. Luckily, I talked my boyfriend into taking me home and the night ended well. I didn’t go on too many group dates after that and I’m not sure I’d recommend them now.

One thing is for sure, evaluate all the options, scenarios and possibilities when deciding if you really want to go on a “group date.” You might be better off a couple at least you can make your own choices.

A great resource for teens on dating is I Kissed Dating Goodbye by Joshua Harris.

I knew years ago deep in my heart that God was calling me to do something, but what that something was I did not know. During my teen years, I was constantly encouraged by my parents, my youth director and many others in my life to be different from the norm, to not follow the crowd. My dad even spelled my name Alyssa, pronounced A-le-sha, different for the very reason that he wanted me to be different.

Not only did he want me to be different, but he also wanted me to be independent. He always taught me to stand on my own two feet. These are things that have helped me to become the person I am today.

Through the events that I felt led to create, I hope to teach girls how they too can be different, “set apart” and truly beautiful in the eyes of God and others for being who they really are. It is my hope and prayer that I can be a part of your ministry or organization and touch your life in some way!

Thank you for visiting my site. To learn more about me please click here.

Emotional, moody, on edge, what is wrong with them?? Boys and men most likely won’t ever understand the people in their lives they call girls. My younger brother is just beginning a new relationship, one of many in his 21 years of life, however, he still does not get it. What is it you ask… the girl. He does not understand the emotional, on edge, touchiness that she has on a regular basis. Nor does he get that she really is not trying to pick a fight or be a nuisance. She is just being herself, she is just being a girl.
For me everything she is doing makes perfect sense. It would most likely to all you girls and women out there. She is emotional if he does not call and she feels that he is angry at her if he raises his voice or questions her intentions. She is on edge and worries that she will loose him so she hangs on to his ever sly comment, even when he’s just kidding. Crazy? No, she is just being herself, the weaker sex as they say. But really is there anything wrong with her being this way. My answer, “NO.” It’s just a part of being a girl, coming of age in a uncertain, insecure world. Nothing is certain in today’s society and relationships are no exception. As long as there are girls and guys and relationships there will be misunderstandings and miscommunication. Boys may never understand us as girls, but I bet there’s one thing for sure. We don’t understand them either.

In the wake of the Virginia Tech shootings I know all parents across the country are shaken and a little nervous about their children being on the campus of high schools, elementary schools and college campuses nationwide. I know as a teenager that my father often preached what seemed like a sermon to me on being alert and not being naive about those who I came into contact with. The old saying is true, “Never trust nobody.”

We really cannot be too careful with our children these days. In the Internet age, the people who we are trying to stay away from have access to us and our children who are online 24/7. Warn your daughters about talking to strangers online, just as you did when she was a young child, it is true, “don’t talk to strangers.” Never give anyone you don’t know your contact information, meaning your phone number, email, cell phone number or address. It is even dangerous for teens to display their school or work place names on their contact pages online because people can easily find them at these places. Never agree to meet someone you met online is another tip to tell your daughter.

Then when out in public we must all be alert and aware of those around us. This is a good practice to teach your daughter as well. My father was a stickler for locking your car doors, even when driving and never stopping on the side of the road or in an area not well lit or with few people around. We must teach out children to really think about the situation and the area around them when making the choice of whether or not they should go into an area or stop in as specific location. You truly can never be too careful.

I know that the things that happened at VT could truly happen anywhere and therefore we must caution our children and teach them as best we can to be safe.

One of my very favorite songs these days is Anyway by Martina McBride. The lyrics to this song are as follows:

You can spend your whole life buildin’
Something from nothin
One storm could come and blow it all away
Build it anyway

You could chase a dream
That seems so out of reach
And you know it might not ever come your way
Dream it anyway

God is great but sometimes life aint good
And when I pray
It doesn’t always turn out like i think it should
But I do it anyway
I do it anyway

This worlds gone crazy
And it’s hard to believe
That tomorrow will be better than today
Believe it anyway

You can love someone with all you heart
For all the right reasons
And in a moment they can choose to walk away
love em anyway

God is great but sometimes life aint good
And when I pray
It doesn’t always turn out like i think it should
But I do it anyway
Yeah I do it anyway

You can pour your soul out singin’
A song you believe in
That tomorrow they’ll forget you ever sang
Sing it anyway
Yeah sing it anyway

I sing
I dream
I love anyway

I am a believer in dreaming big. My dad was always the person who taught me to reach for the stars and believe in myself and that I could accomplish anything I set my mind to. That is why this song is such an inspiration to me. The words of it are so very true. God gave us the ability to live, dream, sing, love and we should do it. He is ultimately in control and He is GREAT, but our prayers may not always be answered the way that we think that they should. It is like the Bible verse says, “A man plans his course but the Lord determines his steps.” Proverbs 16:9
Ultimately we must believe in ourselves and in that God that is so great, and that he will determine our steps for tomorrow and that they too will be great. So just do it anyway!

My very first publication, My Heart to His: Prayer Journal Devotional Guide, a guide for teen girls ages 12-18 on how to use a prayer journal is now available. This guide also includes devotionals on prayer. It is available for purchase at Lulu for $9.77 plus shipping. This is a must have for all teen girls. Prayer journaling is a lost art but a meaningful practice for teen girls to truly connect to GOD, and as a result growing in their relationship with Him.

]]> http://www.beautybydesignonline.com/2007/04/16/my-heart-to-his-prayer-journal-devotional-guide-now-available/feed/ 0 http://www.beautybydesignonline.com/2007/04/12/joy/ http://www.beautybydesignonline.com/2007/04/12/joy/#comments Thu, 12 Apr 2007 14:12:19 +0000 adavant http://www.beautybydesignonline.com/blog/?p=66

By Alyssa Avant

What do you allow to steal your joy? First, we must define joy. Joy is intense satisfaction that fills you with gladness. True joy is not based on circumstances, it comes from God, so what do you allow to steal it from you. For some it may be financial worries, for others failure or lack of success, for some it may be the lack of or the troublesomeness of a relationship, whatever the case may be why do we allow it to happen. If joy comes from the Lord, then why are we not partaking of the joy that he wants to freely give to us.
I know for myself, I do not truly allow him to be my strength and my hope. The Bible tells us “The joy of the Lord is my strength” Nehemiah 8:10 and Philippians 4:13 says, “I can do everything through him who gives me strength.” So, why do we not allow him to be that strength for us? As I said, I do not always allow him to be my strength. I try to do it on my own. When I want something, so badly I will try as hard as I can to make it happen. I will work myself to death. When I could simply go to the Lord and ask him and I shall receive.
Today, I was questioning the success of my life. Lately, I have made some major life changes and transitions, which have caused me to question my own success. Though, through these changes I feel I have followed the call of the Lord on my life I also have worried because of the “unknown.” As I was reading in my devotional time, it was stated in the book that I was reading that we allow the unknown to steal our hope. This is exactly what I have done as I have sat and pondered whether or not I was being successful and whether or not my family and I will be okay financially in the days ahead. It went on to talk about how God will provide all my needs and I should focus on what I do know to be true and what I do know to do and that is to do what the Lord has given me to do the task he has equipped me for and leave the rest to him.
This gave me a new hope, a new outlook and helped me to know I must only focus on Him and the purpose and task He has laid before me, and leave the rest to Him. What about you, what are you allowing to steal your joy? Do not let it take away what the Lord has for you. Renew your strength, reevaluate your focus and use his guidance to help you today.

]]> http://www.beautybydesignonline.com/2007/04/12/joy/feed/ 0 http://www.beautybydesignonline.com/2007/04/07/the-butterfly-effect/ http://www.beautybydesignonline.com/2007/04/07/the-butterfly-effect/#comments Sat, 07 Apr 2007 16:53:14 +0000 adavant http://www.beautybydesignonline.com/blog/?p=65

A very kind lady whom I have never met in person sent me a very special gift this week. It was a beautiful, antique butterfly pin. She also wrote a very encouraging note to me regarding my ministry. The reason she sent the butterfly is that she knew I liked them. She had noticed that I use them a lot on my website and in my promotional materials for my ministry. I have a reason for doing so, and it is very similar to what she said my ministry reminded her of, that is “the butterfly effect”. I had heard of the butterfly effect but I wasn’t sure what she meant by it, so I looked it up. Here is what I found:

“The phrase refers to the idea that a butterfly’s wings might create tiny changes in the atmosphere that ultimately cause a tornado to appear (but not prevent a tornado from appearing). The flapping wing represents a small change in the initial condition of the system, which causes a chain of events leading to large-scale phenomena. Had the butterfly not flapped its wings, the trajectory of the system might have been vastly different.”

This is very much what I am attempting to do with my ministry. I am attempting to by one small thing at a time, one girl at a time, one mom at a time, change the way that girls feel about themselves, present themselves and see themselves. I want them to see themselves as God sees them. God created us, as he did butterflies. Butterflies evolved from caterpillars, caterpillars as we all know are not very beautiful creatures, but butterflies sure are. We on the other hand are created in God’s image, and therefore we are all beautiful, even more so, we are truly “beautiful” when we choose to accept Jesus into our lives. He is truly what makes us beautiful and that is what I am attempting to change the lives of girls, young and old with, the message that they can truly be beautiful by allowing Jesus to not only be their Savior but also the LORD of their lives and leading their lives.
Then in turn, they will affect the world around them, continuing the “butterfly effect.” What a wonderful concept…. don’t you think?

]]> http://www.beautybydesignonline.com/2007/04/07/the-butterfly-effect/feed/ 0 http://www.beautybydesignonline.com/2007/04/07/im-in-the-paper/ http://www.beautybydesignonline.com/2007/04/07/im-in-the-paper/#comments Sat, 07 Apr 2007 16:26:40 +0000 adavant http://www.beautybydesignonline.com/blog/?p=64

This week I was featured in a small article in The Baptist Record, a journal of the Mississippi Baptist Convention that goes out to all households that are members of a Southern Baptist Church in Mississippi. If you receive the Baptist Record, check it out. It is on the back page.

]]> http://www.beautybydesignonline.com/2007/04/07/im-in-the-paper/feed/ 0 http://www.beautybydesignonline.com/2007/04/02/wahm-of-the-month/ http://www.beautybydesignonline.com/2007/04/02/wahm-of-the-month/#comments Tue, 03 Apr 2007 00:22:48 +0000 adavant http://www.beautybydesignonline.com/blog/?p=63

I am the featured WAHM of the month on Time for A Coffee Break monthly ezine for moms. Check it out!

]]> http://www.beautybydesignonline.com/2007/04/02/wahm-of-the-month/feed/ 0 http://www.beautybydesignonline.com/2007/04/02/so-youd-like-to-help-your-daughter-connect-to-god-amazon-guide/ http://www.beautybydesignonline.com/2007/04/02/so-youd-like-to-help-your-daughter-connect-to-god-amazon-guide/#comments Tue, 03 Apr 2007 00:20:48 +0000 adavant http://www.beautybydesignonline.com/blog/?p=62

I have created a guide on Amazon.com of books I recommend to moms for their daughters, to help them connect to God. Check it out! My Amazon Guide.

]]> http://www.beautybydesignonline.com/2007/04/02/so-youd-like-to-help-your-daughter-connect-to-god-amazon-guide/feed/ 1 http://www.beautybydesignonline.com/2007/03/27/attitude-is-everything/ http://www.beautybydesignonline.com/2007/03/27/attitude-is-everything/#comments Wed, 28 Mar 2007 02:09:24 +0000 adavant http://www.beautybydesignonline.com/blog/?p=60

I am convinced that life is 10% what happens to me and 90% how I react to it — and so it is with you… we are in charge of our attitude.” – Chuck Swindoll

A wise quote from one of my favorite authors and men of God. I have to completely agree with him. When I was in high school my absolute favorite quote was “Attitude is Everything.” I had come about this quote while in modeling school. My instructor I believe used it quite a bit and it is really true. Your attitude about any given situation affects not only your outlook on the situation, the outlook of those around you, but also the results that may follow. Currently, I am in a transitional time in my life. I am transitioning from being a youth/children’s director at my church part time, and a mom of one 3 year old son to being a full time mom to two children and a Christian author and speaker trying to promote my ministry and make an income for it by promoting some products and services.
This is not my first time to deal with change. Change is inevitable. Some people thrive on change, others run from it. I am a part of the later most of the time. I am not a fan of change. Growing up I lived in the same 1400 square foot house in a middle class neighborhood from the age of 2 to age 18, when my parents decided to buy a new, larger home in the same exact neighborhood I was devastated. I was the last one to move my stuff out, sitting in the floor of my little room hoping that they would let me stay. I did not welcome the change.
There are many changes in my life I can think of that I originally faced with an attitude of negativity. Did the negative attitude make things any better? Well of course not. I soon learned that my attitude really made a difference in the situation. Take my current situation of transition and change. If I have an attitude of negativity, I will truly affect the outcome more than likely making myself, my husband and even my children miserable. However, if I have a positive attitude believing in myself, in God’s promises of provision and in his mission and purpose for my life, then I shall thrive.
I know that each of us face changes in our daily lives, however, your attitude will be a huge deciding factor upon the results of those changes. Make sure that you attitude truly means EVERYTHING is looking up!

]]> http://www.beautybydesignonline.com/2007/03/27/attitude-is-everything/feed/ 1 http://www.beautybydesignonline.com/2007/03/21/announcing-the-birth-of-lillian-claire-avant-lily/ http://www.beautybydesignonline.com/2007/03/21/announcing-the-birth-of-lillian-claire-avant-lily/#comments Wed, 21 Mar 2007 21:44:00 +0000 adavant http://www.beautybydesignonline.com/blog/?p=59

Lillian Claire Avant made her arrival on Friday, March 16, 2007 at 1:14 pm at the Grenada Lake Medical Center, in Grenada, MS.

She was 7 pounds 14.8 ounces and was 19 inches long. She has brown hair and dark blue eyes.

She was welcomed home by her BIG brother Baker.

Mommy and Baby are doing great!

]]> http://www.beautybydesignonline.com/2007/03/21/announcing-the-birth-of-lillian-claire-avant-lily/feed/ 1 http://www.beautybydesignonline.com/2007/03/05/its-official/ http://www.beautybydesignonline.com/2007/03/05/its-official/#comments Mon, 05 Mar 2007 15:29:19 +0000 adavant http://www.beautybydesignonline.com/blog/?p=57

I can now officially announce my resignation from Carrollton Baptist Church as Youth/Children’s Director. I am blessed to be able to say that this departure was an easy one. I am stepping down from being on staff but my family and I are very blessed to be able to remain in this loving church family as members and volunteer in the roles and capacities that the Lord leads us to in the future. It is going to be very exciting to see what the Lord is going to do in our church and in my ministry to girls. I know with great certainty that “He who began a good work, will be faithful to complete that good work.” This is very exciting! I appreciate very much all the love and support I have received from the church, my friends and family through this time of transition. We are now anxiously awaiting Baby Lily’s birth any day now! Thank you for your prayers!

]]> http://www.beautybydesignonline.com/2007/03/05/its-official/feed/ 0 http://www.beautybydesignonline.com/2007/02/26/plans/ http://www.beautybydesignonline.com/2007/02/26/plans/#comments Tue, 27 Feb 2007 03:04:19 +0000 adavant http://www.beautybydesignonline.com/blog/?p=56

The Bible says that faith is “being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we cannot see.” Though, I cannot see the future, I am certain that God has big plans for my life. Planning is such a fun thing to do isn’t it? I love to plan, much more than I love to do anything else. I like to plan my meals more than I like to cook and especially more than I like to clean up after cooking. I like to plan activities for my family, friends and the church. Though following through is fun; to me the planning is the best part.
When it comes to our lives though, God wants to be a part of our plans. Proverbs 16:9 says, “in his heart a man plans his course, but the LORD determines his steps.” I have had so many plans for my life over the years. When I was in high school I made big plans in my mind for my future, including plans to attend college and seminary, get married, and have children. I also wanted to be a “career woman”. Obviously, the Lord agreed with some of those plans and with others he had another “plan”. In 1998, the Lord called me to ministry. I committed my life to full time Christian service in a worship service at my church before the congregation as my witnesses. I knew in my heart it was what God was calling me to do. But I did not know what specifically he would have me to do in the days, months and years that lay ahead of me.
This was in December of 1998. I was clueless as to what my future really held. At the time, I was still dating my “high school sweetheart” and though our relationship was rocky, we were still holding onto it. I was planning to attend college at a private Christian college the following fall. I was enjoying my senior year and excited about my future.
The Lord has a funny way of keeping you on course with Him. Your ship might be headed in one direction when He shows you, no this is not the course I am charting dear child, you must venture into new waters. Those new waters for me meant, a new relationship, an opportunity to work at a Christian camp for the summer, and a short lived Christian college experience. You see, in February 1999, I broke up with my high school sweetheart for the last time. Two weeks later I met my husband to be; little did I know at the time. Then, I landed a position at Camp of the Rising Son for the Summer of 1999. In June, I became engaged. In August, I left for the Christian college, had four months of extreme homesickness and came home to go to community college in the Spring. Over the matter of months my life completely changed before my eyes. God had used his strength and his power to create a life for me that was better than anything I could have ever dreamed up or planned.
Over the next several years, I got married, became a youth/children’s director, finished college, became pregnant, built a house, and started seminary. The pieces of the big puzzle called my life began to fall into place. The things that I had wished for and dreamed of were given to me multiplied by 100 to be even greater than I had hoped. At the age of 23 I was married, with a college degree, a great job in ministry, a new home and a new baby. But God was not finished. In reality, God is never finished. You see, I am now 26 and God has taken me through 3 more years of amazing blessings. I am about to have my second child and I have watched God show me over the past 3 or 4 years that He can even do greater things than He did before. You see, when I had all those things fall into place, I just mentioned, I thought I had arrived. All my dreams had already come true. All my plans had been fulfilled. However, God has more in store.
One of my long lost dreams was to be a public speaker and writer and to own my own business. I say that it was long lost because it was one of those dreams I never thought could ever truly become a reality. It was one of those �wish upon a star� type of dreams. However, over the past few years God begun putting the puzzle pieces of this dream into place, allowing me to speak at events, gain experience working with youth, children and their families, grow in knowledge of His Word through Seminary, mature as a person through raising a child, and being a wife and mom. He has also placed encouraging people into my path, and given me the support of a husband who would literally do anything for me. He has likewise blessed me with a church family who is loving, supportive, and a place where, not only I but also, my husband and I feel loved and cherished like never before. Church is literally my 3 year old son, Baker�s, favorite place to be besides home or his grandparents; and for that I am grateful. He has also blessed me with friends who are beyond what words can describe. These girls, known as the TOMgirls (our missions/Bible study group name), make me laugh until my sides ache, keep me encouraged and challenge me in my walk with the Lord. God put all these things in my life for a very special reason.
The Lord has allowed me to create Beauty By Design Ministries, a ministry to girls of all ages and their moms. A ministry I began working on in January 2005 when I began speaking at churches to groups of girls and sometimes groups of girls and their moms. From there, the Lord has given me one opportunity after another to do many speaking engagements, begin writing, create a website to promote my ministry, and recently create products and other services, such as Biblically based event planning for girls birthday parties, retreats, mother/daughter teas and other events, parties in a box and gift boxes. I make myself available to speak at churches, clubs and other organizations without any financial obligation required. Most groups have given me a love offering and covered my travel expenses. God has blessed this. My other products and services are reasonably priced and help to support the ministry so that I can reach those who cannot contribute to the ministry financially.
I am amazed at the course God has set before me. I am humbled by the responsibilities he has given me and I am grateful for the opportunities. In the days ahead, I know he will continue to show me the way, as I follow HIS path for my life.

]]> http://www.beautybydesignonline.com/2007/02/26/plans/feed/ 0 http://www.beautybydesignonline.com/2007/02/23/true-love-waits/ http://www.beautybydesignonline.com/2007/02/23/true-love-waits/#comments Fri, 23 Feb 2007 19:53:34 +0000 adavant http://www.beautybydesignonline.com/blog/?p=54

What is “true love”?

Have you ever thought that you were in love? I know I did when I was dating; early on in my teen years. But was it really love? I am not going to say for sure, but I do know that the Bible describes love best. It does so in 1 Corinthians 13:4-8 which say,

“Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails.”

These are all characteristics of true love. Love is also about a relationship. The purest form of a love relationship is that of Jesus Christ. We must look for characteristics of Jesus in another person in order to find true love.

So many times today, we allow other characteristics such as physical appearance, popularity, or personality to attract us to someone else. This causes us to be convinced that it is �true love� and then we often share the rarest gift that we have with the wrong person.

Love is not an emotion, but rather both a commitment and a devotion to someone else. If you are truly committed to and devoted to something you can wait for it. Christ was so devoted to us that he gave his own life. We need to be so devoted to our “true love” that we can wait to give them our rarest gift.

Likewise, sex and love are not the same. Sex is a completion of two people becoming one. The Bible explains it is a part of a marriage relationship, another gift given to us by God.

Pre-marital sex only leads to pain and heartache because it does not include the characteristics of the true love relationship, that of commitment and devotion. If you think about it, most people who participate in pre-marital sex do it on a whim or because of a long night of drinking. They are not in any means committed to or devoted to the person with whom they share their rarest gift.

I can remember vividly being a part of a True Love Waits rally. The True Love Waits campaign began in 1993. I was 13 years old. Standing in about the second pew of the church. I was asked to sign a card committing to stay sexually pure until marriage. I signed that card and committed in my heart also to stay sexually pure. So did my best friend, Laura. We even had a conversation afterwards saying that we would hold each other accountable. That next year Laura moved away. I was not in constant contact with her, and therefore it was a little more difficult to hold each other accountable. However, almost 2 years later, late one night, I had just arrived home from a date with my boyfriend; when the phone rang. I fully expected it to be my boyfriend who always called me after he arrived home. However, it wasn’t, it was Laura, speaking through her tears, told me that she had broken her promise and had given away her rarest gift that night. She shared with me how badly she regretted it, how much she felt cheated, how she felt scared, alone, and dirty. It hurt me so bad that she had done it and I longed to reach out over the phone lines and make it better. But, there was nothing I could do.

You see, when you have sex outside of marriage, that person can so easily and freely walk away from you because there is no real commitment made between the two of you. That night, Laura’s boyfriend had to go home, they weren’t married, they were young, stupid, and had made a mistake. They broke up later and there was nothing left for her to hang on to, no way to feel that love or devotion.

I can tell you that my friend was heartbroken and I can tell you that “true love waits” and heartbreaks don’t. If you want to be heartbroken, give away your rarest gift to the wrong person too soon.

Therefore, how can you avoid this heartbreak occurring in your life? Well, the Bible says, “Do not be mislead, bad company corrupts good character.” 1 Corinthians 15:33

When I was in high school I was constantly pressured more so by my friends and peers than by my boyfriend himself to participate in pre-marital sex.

If you surround yourself with those who are sinning and in sin then you too will be pulled into sin. I know that this is sometimes unavoidable. However, be watchful and mindful of those with whom you spend your time. People will automatically think you are like those that you hang around. And, as my dad always used to say, you will be “guilty by association.” Plus, you will be more tempted. Everyone undergoes this temptation. However, how you choose to respond to it is what is important. The Bible says, “No Temptation has seized you except what is common to man, And God is faithful and he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear.” 1 Corinthians 10:13 (NIV)

It is important that you are ready, that you know how to avoid this temptation. For instance, what you spend your time thinking about and dwelling upon will eventually become what you will do. Your thoughts do indeed become your actions. Psychologists have proven this true. If you dwell upon lusting after the opposite sex, then you will be led into the temptation and indeed sin. Remembering that “whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable, if anything is excellent or praiseworthy, think about such things.” Philippians 4:8

True Love is indeed worth waiting for. Not only will you be rewarded with the rarest gift your spouse has in their life, on your wedding night, but you will understand and appreciate the commitment and devotion that you share with each other; from that day forward. And only Christ defines true love better than that.

]]> http://www.beautybydesignonline.com/2007/02/23/true-love-waits/feed/ 0 http://www.beautybydesignonline.com/2007/02/19/true-love-waits-rally/ http://www.beautybydesignonline.com/2007/02/19/true-love-waits-rally/#comments Mon, 19 Feb 2007 15:20:24 +0000 adavant http://www.beautybydesignonline.com/blog/?p=52

Alyssa will be speaking at the True Love Waits Rally, this Thursday, Feb. 22, at 6:00 pm at the First Baptist Church in Winona, MS. The Rally is being organized by the Devotional Club of Winona Public Schools. All teenagers in and around the Winona area are invited to attend.

True Love Waits (TLW) is an international Christian group that promotes sexual abstinence for teenagers. TLW was created in April, 1993, and is sponsored by LifeWay Christian Resources. It is based on the Biblical command to remain faithful to one’s husband or wife, even before marriage.

]]> http://www.beautybydesignonline.com/2007/02/19/true-love-waits-rally/feed/ 0 http://www.beautybydesignonline.com/2007/02/10/im-going-to-be-on-radio/ http://www.beautybydesignonline.com/2007/02/10/im-going-to-be-on-radio/#comments Sat, 10 Feb 2007 14:50:50 +0000 adavant http://www.beautybydesignonline.com/blog/?p=49

I am so excited about the opportunity to be interviewed on radio. Here’s the scoop. The program “Power In The Word” will air live at 2:30 p.m. EST at http://www.blogtalkradio.com/power. It is a 30 minute show and will be recorded. Calls will be taken during the show. If you would like to call in the call in number is 646-652-4832. I will be interviewed over the phone. I am being interviewed by Rebecca Simmons, moderator of the Christian Women of Power networking group on Ryze Networking here online. Thank you Rebecca for the opportunity!

]]> http://www.beautybydesignonline.com/2007/02/10/im-going-to-be-on-radio/feed/ 0 http://www.beautybydesignonline.com/2007/02/06/to-god-be-the-glory-for-a-fabulous-girls-retreat-in-picayune/ http://www.beautybydesignonline.com/2007/02/06/to-god-be-the-glory-for-a-fabulous-girls-retreat-in-picayune/#comments Tue, 06 Feb 2007 15:51:02 +0000 adavant http://www.beautybydesignonline.com/blog/?p=46

There is absolutely nothing else to attribute this weekend to but the Lord’s Work… to GOD BE THE GLORY. The True Beauty Girls’ Retreat in Picayune that I led this weekend was beyond fabulous, beyond words. I had a blast, I feel that the girls did as well, and I know that God spoke through me to have them hear what HE wanted them to hear. The girls were all wonderful and full of God given potential. The parents and other adults that were there were a pleasure to be around as well. Bro. Shad and his wife, Dana were a delightful couple and I just had such a great time with everyone.

Bro. Shad treated Greg and I to an awesome seafood place on Friday night. It was called Dockside we all three ordered poboys. I have never had such an amazing tasting sandwich. I got a stuffed crab poboy. WOW That was good! The best sandwich I think I have ever tasted. The town of Picayune is almost on the Louisiana state line. Therefore its almost on the Gulf of Mexico and they are able to get seafood in season and it is fresh and tasty! Greg and I are sure that if we ever go back we will go back to that restaurant.

I am soo glad I have trusted God and taking that step of faith. He is truly affirming in me that I am doing exactly what He is asking of me. I am at peace, I am having a wonderful time with my ministry, and I am anxiously anticipating everything He is going to continue to do. As a favorite Christian song of mine says, “He who began a good work in you, He’ll be faithful to complete it, He’ll be faithful to complete it.” I believe God is going to complete that good work He has begun in my life. I am just watching and waiting to see what happens next.

]]> http://www.beautybydesignonline.com/2007/02/06/to-god-be-the-glory-for-a-fabulous-girls-retreat-in-picayune/feed/ 0 http://www.beautybydesignonline.com/2007/01/25/now-available-to-moms-heart-to-heart-mom-daughter-connection-ezine/ http://www.beautybydesignonline.com/2007/01/25/now-available-to-moms-heart-to-heart-mom-daughter-connection-ezine/#comments Thu, 25 Jan 2007 21:11:31 +0000 adavant http://www.beautybydesignonline.com/blog/?p=44

I am excited to announce that I am now offering a monthly ezine to anyone who would like to subscribe. The following is a description of what the ezine will offer.

This ezine will offer Biblically based devotions for moms as well as other tips and suggestions to help grow and strengthen their relationship with their daughters.

It will include inspiring articles, recommended products and readings, Alyssa’s View of the News and what is affecting girls today. It will also include product specials and announcements for Beauty By Design Ministries.

I hope that you will subscribe and recommend it to your friends. You may do so by visiting the following link.

Just join the group to begin receiving the monthly ezine. The first edition will be sent to you on Monday, February 5.

Please post a comment here to let me know you joined! Thanks!

]]> http://www.beautybydesignonline.com/2007/01/25/now-available-to-moms-heart-to-heart-mom-daughter-connection-ezine/feed/ 1 http://www.beautybydesignonline.com/2007/01/23/prayer-journal-gift-boxes-launched/ http://www.beautybydesignonline.com/2007/01/23/prayer-journal-gift-boxes-launched/#comments Tue, 23 Jan 2007 14:09:10 +0000 adavant http://www.beautybydesignonline.com/blog/?p=43

I am excited to announce the launch of the Prayer Journal Gift Boxes. It is amazing to see your ideas come to fruition and actually become a real product on your very own website. I am excited to see how God has worked through the prayers of my own life. I myself, can look into my own prayer journal and see God has answered those prayers I have prayed over the last year or two about doing something just like this with the knowledge and passion that he has given me to serve him and to tell others about him and how they too can have a meaningful relationship with him.

The Prayer Journal Gift Boxes include a spiral bound prayer journal, designer pen, and scripture book mark as well as a booklet written by me on the importance of prayer journaling, how to begin, and a week’s worth of devotions to get you started. This prayer journal devotional guide is targeted to teen and preteen girls. This gift box is perfect for girls in all walks and stages of preteen and teen life, but makes a great gift for a girl at one of those precious milestones such as turning 13, Sweet 16, graduating high school, going away to college, or even getting married. It is never too soon or too late to begin using a prayer journal.

Check them out at http://www.beautybydesignonline.com/giftbox.php Also keep checking back often as I will have various colors and styles of journals available soon as well as our first party in a box kit as well.

]]> http://www.beautybydesignonline.com/2007/01/23/prayer-journal-gift-boxes-launched/feed/ 0 http://www.beautybydesignonline.com/2007/01/10/an-update/ http://www.beautybydesignonline.com/2007/01/10/an-update/#comments Wed, 10 Jan 2007 15:31:29 +0000 adavant http://www.beautybydesignonline.com/blog/?p=40

I wanted to post an update on the progress of the Beauty By Design Store. I am happy to say that the store is up and has information on its pages. It is not yet open for business as I am still getting the samples and everything together. However, the “My Heart to His” Prayer Journal Gift Boxes will be the first to launch and be available on the site. I am very excited about these and know that everyone will love them. They are the perfect gift for any teen girl.

I would like to thank Crystal Unrau, my webmaster for all her hard work on the website. It looks amazing! If you ever need any web design done please give her a chance to work with you. Her website is located at http://designsbychrys.com She has very reasonable rates as well.

Please continue to check back to our site for the new store’s grand opening!

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I have to make this my very first link that I recommend to my readers because this is the link to a dear friend’s website, Christina Lintz is the owner and operator of Cyerra Rose, which is an online vintage boutique offering elegant designer fabric keepsake, heirloom, and home decor boxes that are absolutely beautiful in my opinion. Chris does high quality, immaculate work and I am proud to recommend her to my readers. Please visit her website and check out her fabulous products!

]]> http://www.beautybydesignonline.com/2007/01/06/cyerra-rose/feed/ 0 http://www.beautybydesignonline.com/2007/01/04/studying-gods-word/ http://www.beautybydesignonline.com/2007/01/04/studying-gods-word/#comments Thu, 04 Jan 2007 18:50:18 +0000 adavant http://www.beautybydesignonline.com/blog/?p=35

Studying God’s Word, The Bible, is something that each and everyone of us should learn to do daily. This I know is for some, quite a task, for others a joy, and for even others, maybe a bit scarey at first. However, with time I feel that it can be for everyone something one would look forward to doing daily.

Recently, I have come upon a technique for studying God’s Word that I find both useful and interesting. I have mainly happened up this technique through research and preparation for either classes in seminary, Bible Studies I was preparing for my youth group, or research for speeches for my events with my ministry. This technique is that of a word study. By this I mean that you would simply locate everywhere in the Bible this word appears and then study the context, the meaning, and what you can learn from it. There are many sources one can use for doing a “word study”, commentaries, Bible dictionaries and concordances are all good sources. I use all 3 of these in my word studies and have found them to be helpful.

Recently, my word study has been focused on beauty. I am preparing for a girl’s retreat with the theme “True Beauty” and have found every place in the Bible which the word “beauty” or other forms of this word, such as “beautiful” appear.� That is yet another option, always when doing a word study look for all forms of the word you are studying.

One can find out a great deal about any one topic by simply opening God’s word and studying just that, it’s WORDS!

Question for my readers: How do you all go about studying God’s Word? Please post your answers in the comments section of this post! Thanks!

]]> http://www.beautybydesignonline.com/2007/01/04/studying-gods-word/feed/ 0 http://www.beautybydesignonline.com/2006/12/30/goals-for-2007/ http://www.beautybydesignonline.com/2006/12/30/goals-for-2007/#comments Sat, 30 Dec 2006 19:56:48 +0000 adavant http://www.beautybydesignonline.com/blog/?p=33

As you may have read in the previous blog post here, I had a fabulous 2006 and expect to have an even better 2007. I am excited about the possibilities a new year brings with it. In 2006, I was honored to speak 6 different events. This next year I am setting a goal to be able to speak at 10 events. I also plan to do a great deal of writing and studying in preparation for the future. It is one of my dreams to be a published writer and therefore there is alot that I need to do to make this come true. This year, another goal of mine is to spend time each week writing material for my ministry. A final goal of mine involves this blog. I have a goal to post something new to this blog weekly so that my website is more up to date for its viewers. Thanks for being a reader of my blog and Happy New Year to everyone!

]]> http://www.beautybydesignonline.com/2006/12/30/goals-for-2007/feed/ 0 http://www.beautybydesignonline.com/2006/12/19/my-thoughts/ http://www.beautybydesignonline.com/2006/12/19/my-thoughts/#comments Tue, 19 Dec 2006 22:21:55 +0000 adavant http://www.beautybydesignonline.com/blog/?p=32

Wanted to share with you all what is on my heart today. I feel that the Lord is working in my life, moving mountains as you read this to make miraculous things occur in my life. I’m sure he’s doing the same in yours if you are following HIM and seeking HIS will for your life. I am sooo wanting to do God’s will for my life. I wanted to share with you all, in case some of you aren’t aware of it already, and even if you are to remind you of one of my greatest passions. I have deep passion for allowing the Lord to use me to reach teen and preteen girls for him. As a matter of fact, youth in general are my heart and I feel very lead to reach them for Christ, not just that they come to a saving knowledge of him, but that they live for HIM daily and allow God to steer their lives in the right direction, that they honor God with their thoughts, their actions, their bodies. If you don’t already know, I am a youth/children’s director part time in my church.

However, I feel I have an even greater calling that this. I feel that I am called by GOD to go beyond my small church, my small town, and reach girls in many different areas, teaching them about living for and honoring God in all aspects of their lives. I am blessed to have been raised to live in such a way. I was encouraged, motivated, even sometimes pushed a little to love God with all my heart and to honor him with my life. However, I feel that it was all for my good and for God’s glory. Therefore, I am using what I have learned, what God has blessed me with to teach the girls of this generation to do the same. I have a ministry to girls, Beauty By Design Ministries, that has long been a calling on my heart.

Last January I was blessed to be able to create a website for it and this allowed me to begin to get the word out about my presentations and events that I do for girls groups and organizations, both in and outside the walls of a church. Over the last few days, I have been re-evaluating my ministry and realizing that I need to give it another push. I was honored this past year to speak in several churches and at several events, these include

• First Baptist Church, D-NOW, January 14, 2006, Kosciusko, MS
• First Baptist Church, Valentine’s Banquet, February 15, 2006, Winona, MS
• Bowmar Baptist Church, 6th Grade Mother/Daughter Retreat, March 24, 2006, Vicksburg, MS
• First Baptist Church, Mother/Daughter Spa Night, March 25, 2006, Winona, MS
• Promised Quartet Annual Memorial Day Singing, May 29, 2006, Coila, MS
• First Baptist Church, Spa Night, August 19, 2006, Bruce, MS
• Caree Jo Gammill’s 13th Spa Birthday Bash, October 21, 2006, Carrollton, MS

I am excited about next year and the opportunities it will bring. I am looking now to link up with anyone out there who is interested in my ministry. I need all the support I can get. I would appreciate anyone who would be willing to link to my website or blog, or help in anyway that you can.  I have met a lot of ladies online lately who like me believe in establishing these things in the lives of our young girls. I would appreciate the help of anyone who can help me get the word out about my ministry and possibly get some of my thoughts and ideas published in the form of online articles, and print bible studies and devotional books. Thanks for reading my long-winded thoughts!

]]> http://www.beautybydesignonline.com/2006/12/19/my-thoughts/feed/ 0 http://www.beautybydesignonline.com/2006/11/06/my-1st-girls-spa-birthday-party/ http://www.beautybydesignonline.com/2006/11/06/my-1st-girls-spa-birthday-party/#comments Mon, 06 Nov 2006 18:06:20 +0000 adavant http://www.beautybydesignonline.com/blog/?p=29

I presented at my very first Girl’s Spa Birthday party on Saturday, October 21. The birthday party was for one of my very own youth Caree Jo Gammill who turned thirteen on September 16. She requested that I do this event and it was such a great time. The topic was Turning 13. How appropriate for such an event. I remembered a bit about how it felt to turn 13 myself and then gave the girls some tips from God’s word on how to make the most of it. I appreciated the opportunity to do it and hope to have the opportunity to do more birthday’s in the future.

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Next Saturday, August 19, I will be speaking at First Baptist Church, Bruce, MS. We will be holding a Spa Night for the girls that they are sure to enjoy! I will be posting about the event after it has held and hopefully will have a testimony from both the girl’s and their Youth Director, a friend of mine, Carrie DeVenney. Look for updates here soon!

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links coming soon

]]> http://www.beautybydesignonline.com/2006/08/11/alyssas-recommended-links/feed/ 0 http://www.beautybydesignonline.com/2006/04/12/jennifer-van-norman-bowmar-baptist-church-vicksburg-ms/ http://www.beautybydesignonline.com/2006/04/12/jennifer-van-norman-bowmar-baptist-church-vicksburg-ms/#comments Wed, 12 Apr 2006 21:05:43 +0000 adavant http://www.beautybydesignonline.com/blog/?p=13

Having Alyssa present her Queen Esther “spa night” program was a highlight of our 6th grade mother/daughter retreat. She made each mom and daughter feel truly special and was able to show each girl how unique she was in God’s eyes. She has a great capability to communicate with pre-teens and teach them Biblical wisdom in a manner that is relevant to their life. I would definetly recommend Alyssa and plan to have her back for future events.

Jennifer Van Norman

Children’s Minister Bowmar Baptist Church Vicksburg, MS

]]> http://www.beautybydesignonline.com/2006/04/12/jennifer-van-norman-bowmar-baptist-church-vicksburg-ms/feed/ 0 http://www.beautybydesignonline.com/2006/04/12/fbc-winona-project-esther-motherdaughter-spa-night/ http://www.beautybydesignonline.com/2006/04/12/fbc-winona-project-esther-motherdaughter-spa-night/#comments Wed, 12 Apr 2006 20:14:54 +0000 adavant http://www.beautybydesignonline.com/blog/?p=12

On Saturday, March 25, I had the privilege of speaking to the girls and moms at First Baptist Church, Winona,MS. My home church, and it was a very humbling experience. For one , there were ladies in the room who had taught me piano, or algebra, and for another it was my home church and I knew almost everyone there personally. This was a unique experience though and I am grateful that they allowed me to share. I for one had a wonderful time and hope that they enjoyed themselves.

I would like to thank their youth minister, Michael Wilbanks for the Invitation to come and speak.

]]> http://www.beautybydesignonline.com/2006/04/12/fbc-winona-project-esther-motherdaughter-spa-night/feed/ 0 http://www.beautybydesignonline.com/2006/03/29/busy-womans-planners/ http://www.beautybydesignonline.com/2006/03/29/busy-womans-planners/#comments Wed, 29 Mar 2006 20:03:27 +0000 adavant http://www.beautybydesignonline.com/blog/?p=11

Many times I am asked how I keep up with everything that I do, meaning school, church, this ministry, my 2 year old, my husband and just life? One of the things that has made my life easier just in the past year is owning a Busy Woman’s Planner. I would personally like to thank Susie G., the owner of Busy Woman’s Planners for introducing me to this great product and I would like to share this with you ladies who are visiting my site. This is an awesome planner, and a wonderful way to stay organized. She even customizes your planner to your personality. I am a TYPE A Casual. I love to do lists, so Susie’s planners and customization to my style has worked wonders for me and I hope that you will check her out and maybe that they can do the same for you! Click on the link below to find yours:

Busy Woman’s Planners

]]> http://www.beautybydesignonline.com/2006/03/29/busy-womans-planners/feed/ 0 http://www.beautybydesignonline.com/2006/03/25/motherdaughter-retreat-bowmar-baptist-church-vicksburg-ms-march-24-2006/ http://www.beautybydesignonline.com/2006/03/25/motherdaughter-retreat-bowmar-baptist-church-vicksburg-ms-march-24-2006/#comments Sat, 25 Mar 2006 20:21:13 +0000 adavant http://www.beautybydesignonline.com/blog/?p=9

Friday evening I spent a couple hours with the 6th grade girls and their moms at Bowmar Baptist Church in Vicksburg, MS. We had a fabulous evening of learning from Queen Esther how to become a “princess in God’s court.” Then, we got our own beauty treatments and relaxing through a fun spa night!

Here’s what some of the girl’s had to say about the night…..

Question: What was the best thing about this event?

Answers :

• The Spa treatment and learning about Esther, Lauren, 12.
• I thought the whole thing was very enjoyable and awesome, Haley, 12.

And the moms had a great time too!

• I loved being able to do this with my daughter and watching her enjoy it., a mom.
• The encouragement to be yourself and not follow the crowd. , Michelle, a mom.

I would like to thank Jennifer Van Norman, Children’s Minister at Bowmar for the opportunity to come and share with her girls! I had a blast!

]]> http://www.beautybydesignonline.com/2006/03/25/motherdaughter-retreat-bowmar-baptist-church-vicksburg-ms-march-24-2006/feed/ 0 http://www.beautybydesignonline.com/2006/03/24/welcome/ http://www.beautybydesignonline.com/2006/03/24/welcome/#comments Fri, 24 Mar 2006 17:59:11 +0000 adavant http://www.beautybydesignonline.com/blog/?p=6

Hi Everyone and Welcome

I am very excited to launch this blog. My own little world here on the web. Well, It is actually the home of Beauty By Design Ministries Online. I am honored that you have chosen to come to my site and find out more about my ministry and what it has to offer you.

This site is for you, whether you’re a children or youth minister or leader, a parent of a teen or preteen girl, or a preteen or teen girl yourself, I have something for you.

For children and youth ministers and leaders I have extraordinary events to offer you. I would be priveleged to come and serve with you by doing one of my events for the moms and girls in your ministry. Please read the testmonials section of this blog to hear what others say about the events I’ve done for them, from the leaders perspective as well as from the teen’s perspective. Find out which event is best for your needs. You can also check to see when I am available or when I’ll be in your area and you could pop into an event and check out my work.

For the parents of teen and preteen girls, I invite you to read my Recommended Reading section For Parents and even For Teens. Here I give you biblically based reviews of the latest and greatest materials out there for you and your teen. I personally review Bible studies, books and other materials that you and your teen can benefit from.

For the girls, I hope to encourage you with a peek into my life through my journal, where I will post insights that God has given to me by spending time with him. I also have a Recommended Reading Section for you where you can find some awesome books that help you in the things that you struggle with today.

Thank you so much for visiting my site. I invite you to look around, post comments and return again and again.

~Alyssa

Director, Beauty By Design Ministries

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